Plausible Excuse Comic Strips - Page 8
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131 Results for Plausible Excuse
View 71 - 80 results for plausible excuse comic strips. Discover the best "Plausible Excuse" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday April 08,
2009
Tags #office, #poster, #cheap, #cruel, #mena, #cannibalism, #reading
Transcript
Dogbert the CEO The boss says, "The new motivational posers are in." the boss says, "As you requested, I bought the least expensive ones." Dogbert says, "Excuse me while I stretch my wagger." If all else fails?your coworkers are edible
Saturday August 08,
2009
Tags #guilt, #excuse, #lie, #work, #avoiding, #acting
Transcript
Wally says, "The successful work - avoider combines a fake eagerness to help with just a hint of likely failure." Man says, "Wally, I need load calcs in an hour." Wally says, "No problem! Unless my computer keeps crashing like it did all morning." Man says, "I'll ask someone else." Wally says, "I am begging you to let me help!" Asok thinks, "Wow!"
Thursday September 03,
2009
Tags #asking, #request, #excuse, #ridicule, #lazy
Transcript
Wally says, "Can I work from home? There are too many distractions in the office." The boss says, "Don't you have just as many distractions at your house?" Wally says, "Not unless my idiot couch starts questioning all of my great suggestions."
Saturday October 17,
2009
Tags #sitting, #complaining, #excuse, #meeting, #annoyed, #angry, #frustration, #business
Transcript
Ted the Drama queen Ted says, "I can't attend the meeting Tuesday because Barry thinks I didn't return his flash drive." Ted says, "I'm afraid of him because he's a liar and a drunk, and I heard he killed a cab driver." Ted says, "I'd wear a disguise, but prosthetic adhesives give me hives." Alice thinks, "Must...control...jack...hammer." buddabuddabudda
Sunday February 06,
2011
Tags #annoying music, #buying deciosn, #clutter design, #cubicle, #eacape, #images, #look ugly, #ne wpordcut, #no information, #portfolio, #stock holders, #website, #work till death, #technology
Transcript
The Boss: Dilbert, work with Gustav to get our new product explained on our website. Gustav: Heres what I have so far. Dilbert: Its awful. Gustav: excuse me? Dilbert: there no information. Its all images and annoying music. Dilbert: People make buying decisions based on what they read. This gives them nothing, Gustav: If I clutter the design with useful information, it will look ugly ad I won't be able to use it in my portfolio. I need that portfolio to get a job at a better company, Please help me escape. Gustav: You'll probably work here until you die in your cubicle no matter what the website looks like. The Boss: Did you help Gustav? Dilbert: yes, But it wasn't a good day for our stock holders.
Sunday February 24,
2008
Tags #dating, #advice from dog, #pick up line, #ultimate pick up line, #criticism completes me, #low self esteem, #woman responds, #relationships
Transcript
Dilbert: I'm going to a singles mixer tonight. Do you have any advice? Dogbert: Don't I always?" "It's all about knowing what a woman needs. Find a woman who looks hot, carve her out from the herd and read this. Dilbert: What is it?" Dogbert: It's the ultimate pick up line. Dilbert: Um...Hi. Excuse me. Criticism completes me. woman: He's a keeper.
Sunday November 11,
2007
Tags #favor, #comments, #article, #go away, #wait util tomorrow, #hope, #worthless, #extra work, #worsen results, #ignoring needs
Transcript
Tina: "Wally, can I get your comments on my article by tomorrow?" Wally: "Sure." Tina: "You say, 'sure,' but we both know it's a lie." "You just want me to go away." "You plan to wait until tomorrow and make an excuse." "Then you'll hope I'll give up." Wally: "Yes, but remember, my comments are always worthless, they would cause you extra work and worsen the result." "So if I give you nothing. Everyone wins." Tina: "In that case, thank you for ignoring my needs." Wally: "It's the least I could do."
Thursday August 23,
2007
Tags #dreams, #childhood dreams, #fabric covered box, #living proof, #Women, #don't like winners, #excuse for rejection
Transcript
Dilbert: "When I was a boy, I dreamed of one day working in a fabric-covered box." "I'm living proof that dreams can come true." "Women don't like winners either."
Saturday September 22,
2007
Tags #org chart, #personal problems, #appendix, #health, #excuse, #drama
Transcript
The Boss, "Carol, did you update the org chart yet?" Carol: "No. I kept waiting for it to become more important than my personal problems. But it just never happened." The Boss: "how about right now?" Carol: "Ouch! I think that's my appendix!"
Sunday February 12,
2006
Transcript
Our CEO appreciates pushback. "The last thing he wants is a bunch of yes men." "Don't be afraid to stand your ground. He respects that." "My plan is to form business units around each product line." PLAN "Excuse me. We tried that once and it didn't work." "You're fired. Leave now." "Cruelty or convenience?" "I needed a cubicle to store my extra binders."