Projected Course Comic Strips - Page 8

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115 Results for Projected Course

View 71 - 80 results for projected course comic strips. Discover the best "Projected Course" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 26, 2001's comic on:


Tags #evolution class, #two day course, #surfing student, #cocky squirrel, #janiotr, #three thousand pound squirrel

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Dilbert and Dogbert are sitting at the kitchen table, having cereal and coffee. Dilbert is still in his bathrobe. Dogbert says, "By the end of my two-day evolution class I had one surviving student." Dogbert continues as Dilbert raises his coffee cup, "He's probably the cockiest squirrel I've ever seen. Toward the end he weighed three thousand pounds." Dogbert continues as Dilbert takes a sip, "If you asked me who's the unluckiest person in the world, I'd have to say it was the janitor."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 05, 2002's comic on:


Tags #all natural, #cd drive, #holistic tech support, #natural and holistic, #tree bark, #meditate

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Dogbert talks into a telephone headset, "Hello. This is Dogbert's all-natural and holistic tech support." The man on the other end listens. Dogbert continues, "Try stuffing tree bark in the CD drive and meditating." Dogbert continues, "No, of course it won't damage anything; it's all natural!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 12, 2002's comic on:


Tags #daily prayer services, #blood, #bain washing, #ambitious plans

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A man with a wizard suit, holding an animal-headed staff says to The Boss, "I'd like permission to hold daily prayer services in a conference room." The man continues, "I'll do it before work and of course I'll clean up any blood." The man continues, "So far I'm the only member of my religion but I have ambitious plans for brainwashing."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 03, 2002's comic on:


Tags #need me, #page me, #soar flares, #low tide, #humidity, #equinoxes, #high tide

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Wally says to The Boss, "If you need me, just page me." Wally continues, "I'll cal you right back unless solar flares stop your page from getting through." Wally finishes, "And of course you'll have some blockage during the high tide, low tide, humidity, and most of your equinoxes."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 01, 2003's comic on:


Tags #saved money, #hired guy, #unlucky, #many problems, #ex boyfreind, #sobers up

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The Boss introduces a new employee to Dilbert, "We saved money by hiring a guy who's had many personal problems." The Boss continues, "But we're sure he was just unlucky. No one would invite that many problems into his life." The new employee's cell phone rings. The new employee says into his cell phone, "Yes, of course your ex-boyfriend can stay with us until the choppers leave and he sobers up."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 21, 2004's comic on:


Tags #make changes, #no credibility, #idiots, #phone call, #boss offcie

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Dilbert: "I told Matthew that there was no way we could make those changes." "Ring." The Boss: "Hi, Matthew!... Yes, of course we can make those changes; we're not idiots! Ha ha!!" Dilbert: "He says you have no credibility."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 13, 2004's comic on:


Tags #manipulate, #lying, #Advice, #mayo clinic, #victim to source

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Dogbert: "You can manipulate people by lying about what other people said." "If your victim goes to the source and discovers your treachery, say, of course he tells you that." Dilbert: "Your advice doesn't sound healthy." Dogbert: "That's not what the Mayo Clinic said."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 22, 2004's comic on:


Tags #online study class, #sexual harrasmnet, #don't have one, #happy actors

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Wally: "I'm about halfway finished with the online studay class on sexual harassment." The Boss: "Wally, we don't have an online study course on sexual harassment." Wally: "THat would explain why all the actors seemed so happy."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 11, 2006's comic on:


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Dogbert's Retirement Planning Seminar "I'll show you how to spend your golden years on the golf course." "Get a job caddying for people who have better jobs than you." "Never pay rent again, thanks to the patented Dogbert breathing tube for sand traps!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 14, 2006's comic on:


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Satan's Vendor "We'll send your engineers to our free training course." "The training is held on our own island retreat." "I'm going where?" "Fecalruba."