Repair Guy Comic Strips - Page 8

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372 Results for Repair Guy

View 71 - 80 results for repair guy comic strips. Discover the best "Repair Guy" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 21, 1999's comic on:


Tags #big dumb guy, #disagree, #lazy, #habitual liar, #excellent track record, #excellent work

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The Boss brings a Big Dumb Guy to Alice's desk. He says, "Alice, I'd like you to work with this big dumb guy." The Boss continues, "He doesn't know he's dumb. So he'll tell people you're dumb if you ever disagree." The Boss: "He's also lazy and a habitual liar." Alice shouts, "Then why do you let him work here?!" The Boss explains, "He has an excellent track record. No one knows why." In front of the Boss and Alice, the Big Dumb Guy bends over and picks up the document that Alice was working on from her desk. Big Dumb Guy shows Alice's document to the Boss. Big Dumb Guy says, "Look what I just did." The Boss responds, "Excellent work." Alice is flabbergasted. The Boss tries to console Alice, who is furious, with "Remember Alice, you're never too old to learn."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 11, 2005's comic on:


Tags #associate with, #cjhose, #associate, #lazy people, #new guy

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The New Employee "Maybe if I make a friend at work it will reduce my stress hump." "I must choose carefully because I will be judged by the people I associate with." "Hi. I'm the new guy." "The lazy people have found each other."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 12, 2005's comic on:


Tags #new guy, #strong culture, #doing teask, #unimaginable, #getting suckers, #to do our work

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The New Guy" "We have a strong culture of team--work here." "While you're doing those easy tasks, I'll be off doing assignments of unimaginable diffuculty." Dilbert: "Did anyone warn you that we have a strong culture of getting suckers to do our work?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 13, 2005's comic on:


Tags #new guy, #punch back, #stress hump, #karate chop

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The New Guy "Hey, new guy, that's quite a stress hump you have there maybe I can fix it." "Punch Yaaa!!" "Wow!! It's gone! Does that always work?" "I dunno. To be honest, I just wanted to punch it."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 14, 2005's comic on:


Tags #schedule message, #breakfast, #breakfast guy

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Five-Star Hotel "I'd like to order breakfast and schedule a massage." "Mmm...a nice massage and then breakfast." "Well, I WOULD 'get rubbin,' but I'm only the breakfast guy."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 12, 2005's comic on:


Tags #board meeting, #outsourcing, #ceo job, #26 million, #elbonian ceo, #good guy, #consulting contract

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Board Meeting "I recommend outsourcing your CEO's job and saving the company $26 million per year." "For $4 per year you can hire an Elbonian CEO who is just as good as this guy." "Now do you understand why you should have renewed my consulting contract?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 28, 2005's comic on:


Tags #new guy, #project staus report, #random pharse, #generatormmeail, #listens, #when he's talking

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"Alice, can you show the new guy how to do a project status report?" "He doesn't read them, so we all use a random phrase generator. I'll e-mail it to you." "You said that in front of him." "He only listens when he's talking."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 17, 2006's comic on:


Tags #loud guy section, #no loud guy, #date, #man screams, #stories, #noise, #restaurant, #customers, #hostess, #table nearby

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Would you like to be seated in the loud guy section or no loud guy? Menu "They both sound good. We'll try the loud guy section." "I hope he has good stories." "AND THEN!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 27, 2007's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #moving compnay, #threats, #money, #one he guy, #load truck, #sandwhich, #Food, #exstortion, #couch, #sweat

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The Boss: "I hired the Dogbert Moving Company to handle your relocation." "It saves us money because they only send one huge guy." "After you load your couch on the truck, make me another sandwich, or, again, I'll kill you."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 24, 2007's comic on:


Tags #alien, #bring technology, #handle oa agavel, #new guy, #order in the court, #simpletons, #snout, #working out, #health

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I came to this company to bring the technology of my advanced culture to you simpletons. "Has anyone ever told you that your snout is like the handle of a gavel?" "A what?" "How's the new guy working out?" "ORDER IN THE COURT!" BAM BAM BAM