Ruler Of Earth Comic Strips - Page 8

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133 Results for Ruler Of Earth

View 71 - 80 results for ruler of earth comic strips. Discover the best "Ruler Of Earth" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 15, 1989's comic on:


Tags #national news, #critics, #management, #megaslime corporation, #repitilian, #aliens

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Dilbert sits in his chair watching a television news report. The newscaster says, "And in national news . . ." The newscaster continues, "Critics today accused the management of Megaslime Corporation of being hideous reptilian aliens bent on enslaving the earth." The newscaster continues, "A spokesman for the company denied the charge." Dilbert says, "Whew!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 16, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #android, #civilization, #aliens, #radish-like

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Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on Dilbert's legs. Dogbert asks, "Did you ever get to thinking that maybe you are just an android, placed on earth by an advanced civilization of huge radish-like aliens who are studying your every move?" Dilbert answers, "No." Dogbert says, "Me neither."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 03, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #devil, #lettuce, #kitchen, #rationalization

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Dilbert stands in the kitchen looking at a grocery receipt and thinking, "Looks like they under-charged me twelve cents on the lettuce." Dilbert thinks, "I should go back and give them the twelve cents. But I'm sure they would tell me to keep it for being so honest." Phil, the Prince of Insufficient Light and the Ruler of Heck, shows up at the door and says to Dogbert, ". . . I have a report of a flimsy rationalization in progress." Dogbert says, "Try the kitchen."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 04, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #devil, #lettuce, #prince of insufficient light, #phil, #penalty

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Dilbert stands in the kitchen looking at a grocery receipt and thinking, "Ha! The store under-charged me twelve cents, and I'm not telling them." Phil pokes Dilbert with his spoon and says, "Hey!" Dilbert says, "I know you. You're the Ruler of Heck, the 'Prince of Insufficient Light.'" Phil says, "Just call me Phil, please." Dilbert asks, "What's my penalty? Eternal damnation?" Phil says, "I'm just going to 'darn you' for fifteen minutes."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 05, 1989's comic on:


Tags #phil, #Dilbert, #living room, #Dogbert, #damned, #darned, #sitting

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Dilbert asks Phil, the Ruler of Heck, "Then . . . I won't be damned?" Phil replies, "Just 'darned.' It was a misdemeanor." Phil continues, "You must set your thermostat for 76 degrees and stay in the living room for fifteen minutes." Dilbert and Dogbert sit on the hassock. Dilbert says, "I'm sorry, Dogbert. I brought this upon us." Dogbert says, "It's something you'll have to live with."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 05, 1990's comic on:


Tags #dinosaurs, #babysitter, #dinosaur, #emergency, #scenarios, #burglary, #injury, #poinsoning, #dial 911, #complete, #blank, #here

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Bob the Dinosaur sits across from a man and a woman who are interviewing him. The man says, "Before we hire you as our babysitter, we want to test how a dinosaur like you would respond to a variety of emergency scenarios." The man asks, "What if there's a fire?" Bob replies, "Dial 911." The man asks, "Burglary?" Bob answers, "Dial 911." The man asks, "Injury?" Bob replies, "Dial 911." The man asks, "Poisoning?" Bob replies, "Dial 911." The man asks, "Giant asteroid collides with earth and triggers an ice age?" Bob says, "Oh, wow . . . I'm drawing a complete blank here . . ."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 17, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #world, #pinecone, #fresh, #lemon, #scent, #planet, #Dogbert, #warm, #lightning

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The caption says, "For years Mother Nature had been dropping hints about the ozone problem." The earth and the moon are shown from a distance. Dilbert sprays an aerosol can of air freshener and says, "Aaah . . . Pinecone fresh lemon scent." A flash of lightning enters through the ceiling and shocks Dilbert. The caption says, "The direct approach would work no better." Dilbert's clothes are burned and clouds of smoke rise from his body. Dilbert asks Dogbert, "Is it unseasonably warm today?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 05, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #pillow, #servants, #dog, #hours, #Dilbert, #prison

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Dogbert sits on a pillow thinking, "When I conquer the earth . . . Will it be more efficient to put all humans in prison . . ." Dogbert continues thinking, ". . . Or train them as domestic servants for dogs?" Dilbert watches Dogbert from the doorway and thinks, "It's amazing how dogs can sit for hours thinking absolutely nothing."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 07, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #world, #news, #country, #doug, #tiny, #monarchy, #king, #descendant, #deity, #head, #doesn't

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Dilbert sits in his chair watching the television news. The newscaster says, "In world news, the tiny country of Elbonia has become a despotic monarchy." The news anchorman continues, "The new ruler is King Dogbert, who claims to be a descendant of the Elbonian Deity 'Doug.'" In Elbonia, Dogbert rides on the back of an Elbonian and hits him on the back of his head. Dogbert is wearing a miter and holding a scepter. Dogbert thinks, "I hope this doesn't go to my head."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 23, 1992's comic on:


Tags #disguise, #squirrels, #Dilbert, #garbage, #model, #computer, #chaos theory, #complex, #Alternative, #wild guess, #spy, #squirrel

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Dilbert says to the garbage man, "I know that my computer model is accurate, but nobody believes me when I predict that squirrels will conquer the earth." The garbage man replies, "Of course, you're aware that according to 'Chaos Theory' any complex iterative model is no better than a wild guess, even if the logic is perfect." Dilbert replies, "You're making that up." The garbage man says, "You caught me; I'm really a giant spy squirrel in disguise."