Same Questions Comic Strips - Page 8
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578 Results for Same Questions
View 71 - 80 results for same questions comic strips. Discover the best "Same Questions" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday April 27,
2005
Tags #slight promotion, #pay same, #cucblice larger, #shaving the walls
Transcript
The Boss: "Asok, I decided to give you a slight promotion!" Asok: "Gasp! A slight promotion!" The Boss: "The pay will be the same but you can make your cubicle slighlty larger by shaving the ragged fabric on the inside walls." "Your new title is spelled just like the old one but it's pronounced totally differently." "ZZZZZ"
Monday August 22,
2005
Tags #nonsense, #no questions, #no time
Transcript
The Boss: "Aha! Just the person I need." "Meet with the LDC and make sure the MRT gets URPed when the RFIT gets NERKed to the ORCAT." "If you have any questions, I don't have time for that sort of thing."
Thursday October 06,
2005
Tags #faq for wedsite, #anticipate questions, #questionaire
Transcript
I hired Mr. Dogbert to write the F.A.Q. for our web site. "The key is to anticipate our customers' most likely questions." "Question 1: Where does your CEO live? I need to know so I can throw your cruddy project through his biggest window."
Thursday March 02,
2006
Tags #center of excellence, #presidentail library, #honoring lifes work, #asking questions
Transcript
"I've been asked to design and build our center of excellence." "Which, as I understand it, is like a presidential library honoring my life's work." "In time, people learn to stop asking me questions."
Friday July 20,
2007
Tags #senior engineer, #lead engineer, #pay is same, #disrespect you, #magic
Transcript
The Boss: I'm promoting you from senior engineer to lead engineer. "The pay is the same but people will disrespect you less." Dilbert: "Including you?" The Boss: "It's not magic."
Friday February 08,
2013
Tags #annoyance, #correspondence, #unclear email, #unwillingness, #answer questions
Transcript
Boss: This isn't what I wanted. Dilbert: I know. But given your unclear email and your unwillingness to answer follow-up questions, I decided to do whatever entertained me. Boss: Do we have a problem here? Dilbert: No, this totally works for me.
Saturday April 20,
2013
Tags #laziness, #work ethic, #well rested people, #nap, #ignore science, #synchronize questions, #banana eating
Transcript
Wally: Studies show that well-rested people are more productive. Should I go take a nap or should I ignore science like some sort of pointy-haired baboon? I like to synchronize my questions to his banana-eating.
Thursday May 15,
2008
Tags #assigned same project, #discovered, #one month agao, #50% chance
Transcript
Dilbert: We just discovered that you assigned the same project to both of us a month ago. The Boss: Sometimes I do that when I think neither of you has more than a 50% chance of doing something right. Asok: Hey, I just discovered something. The Boss: Or 33.3%"
Thursday August 14,
2008
Tags #high altitude view, #bunch of termites, #termites hate each other, #eat same log
Transcript
The Boss says, "I don't need to know the details. Just give me the high altitude view." Dilbert says, "From a high altitude we're all a bunch of termites trying to eat the same log." The Boss says, "Maybe drill down a little more." Dilbert says, "The termites hate each other."
Saturday November 01,
2008
Tags #change is good, #most start ups fail, #questions at end
Transcript
The Boss says, "Change is good." Dilbert says, "Then why do most startups fail?" The Boss says, "I only take questions at the end." Someone says, "There's more?"