Sarcasm Comic Strips - Page 8
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270 Results for Sarcasm
View 71 - 80 results for sarcasm comic strips. Discover the best "Sarcasm" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday December 24,
2018
Ask Ted
Tags employees, insults, office workers, sarcasm, technology
Transcript
Man: Do you have the test data? Dilbert: No. Ask Ted. Man: Ted said you have it. Dilbert: I say Ted has it. Man: One of you must dislike me. Dilbert: That's not true. It could be both of us.
Wednesday December 26,
2018
Boss Has A Vision For The Company
Tags managers & supervisors, obliviousness, office workers, sarcasm, listen
Transcript
Boss: And that's my vision for the company. Dilbert: All you did was list the projects we are already working on while making it sound like astrology. Boss: In my defense, I didn't think any of you were listening.
Monday December 31,
2018
New Year Resolution
Tags holidays, new year, sarcasm, weight, new year's resolutions
Transcript
Carol: Do you have any New Year's resolutions? Dilbert: I resolve to not make major decisions about my life based on random calendar dates. Carol: So...nothing about your weight? Dilbert: Worst holiday ever.
Tuesday January 01,
2019
New Year's Day
Tags holidays, new year's day, sarcasm
Transcript
Dilbert: Happy random calendar date. I'll be celebrating by doing nothing fun or useful all day because everything is closed. Dogbert: You could visit your mom. Dilbert: How's that different from what I just said?
Friday January 04,
2019
No Raise For Dilbert
Tags boss, employees, employment, managers & supervisors, office workers, sarcasm, work, salary
Transcript
Dilbert: Can I have a 25% raise to get my compensation up to market levels? Boss: No. Dilbert: Okay. I'll just work 25% less because you won't know the difference. Boss: I would know if you did that. Dilbert: Should I get back to separating the zeroes from the ones in our database?
Monday January 07,
2019
How Long To Make Ai
Tags computers, engineering, intelligence, office workers, sarcasm, technology, robots, humans
Transcript
Boss: How long would it take you to create artificial intelligence that is as smart as humans? Dilbert: It shouldn't take me long to dumb-down a computer to human levels. Boss: What? Dilbert: It might take five minutes, tops.
Wednesday January 09,
2019
Ai Is Stupid For An Hour
Tags intelligence, robot, sarcasm, social media, stupidity, technology, twitter, humans
Transcript
Alice: Your so-called breakthrough in artificial intelligence is a fraud. I talked to it for an hour, and everything it said was stupid. Wait...that's the same as using Twitter. Dilbert: Is it too soon to call me a genius?
Friday January 11,
2019
Ai Keeps Owning The Boss
Tags argument, debates, irritation, office workers, robot, sarcasm
Transcript
Boss: I keep getting into debates with the A.I. you built, and it refuses to admit I'm right. It keeps sending me links to articles on the wrong topic and claiming it "owned me". Dilbert: Please don't ask me to take sides. Boss: I need you to back me on this.
Tuesday January 15,
2019
More Accurate Job Description
Tags distraction, frustration, jobs, managers & supervisors, office workers, sarcasm
Transcript
Dilbert: I updated my job description to be more accurate. Boss: "I try to do something and then I get interrupted a jillion times until the thing no longer matters." Sounds like you need some extra micro-managing. Dilbert: I have to take this call.
Sunday January 20,
2019
Tags annoyance, insults, office, office workers, people, sarcasm, introvert, coworkers
Transcript
Tina: Sometimes it seems as if you don't like me. Dilbert: Don't be ridiculous. I'm just an introvert. Being around people drains my energy. I only avoid you because spending five minutes with you feels like being buried alive. With fleas instead of dirt. Tina: So...it isn't personal? Dilbert: I need a nap.

