Statement Of Core Values Comic Strips - Page 8
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75 Results for Statement Of Core Values
View 71 - 75 results for statement of core values comic strips. Discover the best "Statement Of Core Values" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday January 02,
2016
That's Motivation Not Stalking
Tags #compliment, #managers, #jargon, #sincerity, #insincere, #motivation, #motivate, #annoyance, #frustration
Transcript
Boss: Alice, you're doing a great job and the company values you. Alice: Your insincere management babble is making me uncomfortable. Boss: That's motivation you're feeling. Alice: I'm getting more of a stalker vibe.
Sunday August 21,
2016
Tags #financial, #jargon, #money, #accounting, #language
Transcript
Boss: I think it is important for every employee to understand our company's income statement. I don't have time to get into all of the details, so I'll hit the high points. Compared to last year... our ebida have been amortized over an accrued market discount. Meanwhile, our capital account liabilities have a pass-through income that is far larger than our on-time costs. And the mome raths outgrabe. Too far? Dilbert: I wasn't listening.
Monday May 07,
2018
Massive Data Breach
Tags #data, #facebook, #privacy, #apology, #statement, #big business, #lying, #damage control
Transcript
Dilbert: We had a massive data breach. Hackers got into the private data of all of our customers. Boss: No problem. We'll issue a press release that says we're sorry and it will never happen again. Dilbert: That's what we said the last three times it happened. Boss: Our strategy is to wear them down.
Monday August 19,
2019
Wally Is New Pet Employee
Tags #boss, #business ethics, #criticism, #employees, #managers & supervisors, #office workers, #work ethic
Transcript
Boss: I"m looking for a new pet employee. The ideal candidate would be a brown-nosing tattler with no ethical core. Wally: That sounds like a brilliant idea, even though Dilbert says you are a moron. Boss: You got the job.
Monday June 15,
2020
Real Data
Tags #decision, #office workers, #sarcasm, #dumb, #facts
Transcript
Man: We need to make decisions based on real data! Dilbert: Who do you imagine disagrees with that obvious statement? Man: Uh-oh. I just realized I'm dumb and never knew it. Dilbert: I hear it can sneak up on you.