Talk On Phone Comic Strips - Page 8
715 Results for Talk On Phone
View 71 - 80 results for talk on phone comic strips. Discover the best "Talk On Phone" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share July 24, 1995's comic on:
Wally, Alice and Dilbert sit around a conference table. Wally says, "As usual, the boss is late. What do you want to do?" Dilbert suggests, "Let's practice making small talk. It'll come in handy when we meet with marketing." Wally begins, "So, Alice, haven't we seen that outfit a LOT?" Dilbert leans back in his chair and says, "This chair is springy. Do you think they're all springy?"
Share September 20, 1995's comic on:
Dilbert sits at his desk with a telephone in his hand. A voice on the phone says, "Press 'One' for sales. Press 'Two' in a hopeless effort to get technical support." Dilbert presses "2." The voice on the phone continues, "Press 'One' for answers to questions you don't have. Press 'Two' if you're gullible and optimistic." Dilbert presses "2." The voice on the phone says, "Press 'Two' if you're willing to buy something just so you can talk to a human being . . ." Dilbert puts the phone on the desk and raises a mallet to strike it.
Share July 02, 1989's comic on:
The telephone rings. Dilbert picks up the phone and says, "Hello." The voice on the other end says, "This is the governor . . ." The governor says, "Do you remember that snotty letter you wrote about prison overcrowding? We thought YOU might want to look after one of our guys for thiry or forty years." The doorbell rings. A large man in a prison uniform says, "Hi. I'm Bob. My friends would call me 'Strangler' if they were alive." Bob carries a suitcase into the house and asks, "So, where do you keep the blunt objects? Sure is crowded in here." Dilbert clenches his fist and says, "Ooh! I am so tempted to fire off another letter over this!!" Dogbert says, "Yeah! 'Postage due' this time!"
Share December 03, 1989's comic on:
A man stands behind Dilbert's desk and says, "Dilbert, the Boss would like to talk to you." Dilbert enters the Boss's office and asks, "You wanted me?" The Boss says, "Ah, Dilbert, come in." The Boss says, "I'm taking two weeks of vacation and I need competent leadership while I'm gone." Dilbert thinks, "At last he's giving me an assignment with responsibility." The Boss says, "That's why I got this talking sock monkey. Pull the string twice a day and do what he says."
Share December 17, 1989's comic on:
Dilbert tells Dogbert, "I bought a phone answering machine." Dogbert asks, "Was the phone asking you questions you couldn't answer on your own?" Dilbert says, "The hard part is thinking of a greeting message." Dilbert says into the answering machine, "Hi. This is Dilbert. I'm not here right now." Dilbert says, "Well, technically I am here 'now' . . ." Dilbert says, "But 'now' is a relative term, so use your best judgment in deciding whether I'm here." Dilbert says, "Hmm . . . That was actually a creative little message." Dogbert says, "Demonstrating, once again, that subtle difference between creativity and complex stupidity."
Share September 02, 1990's comic on:
Dilbert sits at his desk thinking, "The worst he can do is fire me . . ." Dilbert says, "Boss, I need to talk to you." Dilbert continues, "I feel you don't respect me . . ." Dilbert continues, "It's an intangible thing . . ." The Boss thinks, "Sneeze coming . . ." Dilbert continues, "I see it in your body language . . ." The Boss grabs Dilbert's shirt. Dilbert continues, ". . . And sometimes the things you say . . ." The Boss rips Dilbert's shirt off his body. The Boss sneezes and uses Dilbert's shirt as a handkerchief. Dilbert sits at his desk without a shirt. He says, "This has been something less than a victory for workers everywhere."
Share November 23, 1993's comic on:
Share January 26, 1996's comic on:
Dogbert stands on a conference table next to a laptop and an overhead projector. He says to the Boss, Alice and Wally, "I've reduced your service costs by giving the technical-support group an unlisted phone number." Dogbert continues, "And a flaw in your product disables the customer's e-mail; they can't even write to you for help!" The Boss asks, "What if they ask a friend to e-mail us?" Alice responds, "People who use our product don't have friends." Wally asks, "Really? I use it."
Share February 10, 1996's comic on:
Dilbert lies on the couch looking worried and Dogbert sits on the backrest. Dilbert says, "I have too many passwords in my life. What if I forget them?" Dogbert's ears fly up and he shouts, "You'd lose your job! You wouldn't be able to withdraw money or check phone messages! You'd be dead in a week!" Dilbert's hair and tie fly up and he says, "That would have been a good time to be quietly supportive, Dogbert." Dogbert responds, "Oh, yeah, that's a lot of fun."
Share May 18, 1996's comic on:
Dogbert stands on Dilbert's desk and says, "With all this talk of 'diversity' there's no mention of the pain we smart creatures endure while surrounded by dolts." Dilbert says, "Good point. I don't know how we do it." Dogbert walks away saying, "It looks like I'll have to hold secret meetings." Dilbert says, "Yeah, our lives are a constant struggle."