Walk Away Comic Strips - Page 8

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631 Results for Walk Away

View 71 - 80 results for walk away comic strips. Discover the best "Walk Away" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #blood pressure screening, #below company average, #get away with

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FREE BLOOD PRESSURE SCREENING TODAY blod pressure screening, below average, more work, Dilbert and the boss are in line to have their blood pressure taken. The boss is holding some folders. Over the head of the woman who is taking Dilbert's blood pressure hangs a board that reads: "Free blood pressure screening today" The woman says to Dilbert: "135 over 88." The boss hands some folders to Dilbert and says: "You're bellow the company average. Here's some more work." Dilbert looks surprised. The boss is behind Dilbert, who is walking all worked up and angry. The boss says to Dilbert: "How long did you think you could get away with that?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #social misfits, #keep him away, #normal people, #engineering liason

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Dilbert sits at his computer working. The Boss approaches with a new employee. The Boss says to the new employee, "Dilbert is one of our social misfits." The Boss says to the new employee, "Your job is to keep him away from normal people." Dilbert, still facing his computer is obviously annoyed by what he is hearing. Unable to keep quiet, Dilbert yells without turning around, "Hello! I'm right here!" The Boss and the new employee unaffected by Dilbert's outburst, continue their conversation. The Boss says to the new employee, "Your title will be Engineering Liason."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #asks on date, #away, #faq section, #ignorant, #without merit, #website, #technology

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Dilbert approaches Ming and says, "Ming, our website needs a FAQ section." Ming replies, "I find your suggestion ignorant and without merit. Away with you." Dilbert, unaffected by her response asks "So...are you doing anything this weekend?" Ming sighs, "Gaaa!!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #away from job, #blah blah, #cell phones, #jurors, #jury duty, #jury room, #read book, #talking

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Dilbert: AAHH, One week away from my job. Jury room Dilbert: I'll have hours of quiet time to read my new book, woman: There's a guy here with a book.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #organization chart, #phone lists shreded, #picking clean, #headhunters, #steal away, #double pay, #drains initiative

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The Boss holds up a piece of paper and says, "From now on, the organization chart will not be distributed." The Boss crumples up a piece of paper and says, "And the internal phone lists will be shredded." The Boss continues, "This will prevent headhunters from easily picking us clean." Wally asks, "Why would headhunters call US?" The Boss explains, "They want to steal you away and double your pay at another company." Wally says, "What makes you think we won't leave on our own anyway?" The Boss replies, "Because working here drains all your initiative." Wally turns to Dilbert and Alice and says, "Let's prove him wrong." Dilbert says, "Yeah! I'm NOT shredding my phone list!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #give away prodcut, #for free, #deinstall it, #bill customers, #consumer despaitations

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The Boss says to Wally and Dilbert, "My plan is to give away our product for free." The Boss says to Wally and Dilbert, "We'll only bill customers who ask us to deinstall it." Wally and Dilbert continue looking on impassively as The Boss continues, "For once, those reports of consumer decapitations will work in our favor."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #discount brokerage, #estate plan, #pass away, #stay dead, #zombie, #bad gifts

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DISCOUNT BROKERAGE: A man on a cell phone says, "I need an estate plan for after I pass away." Dogbert, in his office and wearing a headset, says to the man, "Here's a plan: Stay dead. No one likes a zombie." The man on the cell phone asks, "What about gifts?" Dogbert's reply is, "Zombies make bad gifts."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #downsized, #not one of them, #project cancelled, #wonder, #zombie, #offer to walk, #boos, #fired, #let go, #shock

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Dilbert is sitting in front of The Boss' desk. The Boss says, "Your project is cancelled. You'll be downsized in ninety days." The Boss continues, "Until then, feel free to wander around like a zombie." Dilbert walks past coworkers and thinks to himself, "I walk among them but I am not one of them."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #downsized, #info, #last day, #projects, #right away, #soon enough, #90 days

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The Boss hands Dilbert a stack of papers and says, "Here are some projects to finish before your last day." Dilbert responds, "But.. I'll have to interact with people who know I've been downsized." The Boss replies, "Hee Hee!" A coworker mocks Dilbert, "I'll get this information to you right away. Is ninety days soon enough?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #walk and talk, #not their names, #boss waves, #distarcted

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Dilbert approaches The Boss and asks, "Do you have a second?" The Boss replies, "Walk and talk." Dilbert begins, "So, the supplier won't.." The Boss interrupts him with, "Hi, Pete. Hey, Tim. Hi, Barb. How are you? Not bad. Hi." Dilbert says, "Um.. Those aren't their names." The Boss replies, "My way is easier... Hi, Ted."