Commute To Sit In Box Comic Strips - Page 80
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812 Results for Commute To Sit In Box
View 791 - 800 results for commute to sit in box comic strips. Discover the best "Commute To Sit In Box" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday April 16,
2017
Tags #waiter, #restaurant, #service industry, #impatient, #patience, #complaining
Transcript
Waiter: Here are your french fries. Dilbert: Gaaaa!!! I have no salt. Waiter: I will bring the salt right away. Dilbert: No, you won't. This isn't my first time eating out! You say you will bring salt, but you will be distracted by another table. I will sit here in anger while I watch you do things that do not involve bringing me salt. As the temperature of my fries drops, my cortisol levels will increase. In five minutes I will hate your guts and this restaurant, too. I also need ketchup. Waiter: That will take a little longer.
Thursday April 20,
2017
Vr Cubicle
Tags #virtual reality, #office, #cubicle, #fantasy, #illusion
Transcript
Boss: We're going to use our VR technology to take over the cubicle business. Write a program that makes users feel as if they are working in a fabric-covered box. Dilbert: Maybe we should think outside the box. Boss: Stop resisting change.
Tuesday May 30,
2017
Wally Has A Doctor's Note
Friday June 16,
2017
75 Slides Too Long
Tags #public speaking, #presentation, #length, #brevity, #powerpoint
Transcript
Asok: I have 75 slides to discuss in ten minutes. Save your questions to the end. CEO: Sit down and never talk to me again as long as you live. Dilbert: How'd the CEO presentation go? Asok: It was 75 slides too long.
Saturday June 17,
2017
Ceo Likes Asok's Presentation
Tags #presentation, #public speaking, #powerpoint
Transcript
Boss: Our CEO said he liked your presentation. Asok: He made me shut up and sit down before I got to my first slide. Boss: He's not a big fan of content.
Saturday July 01,
2017
Move To Cubicles Is Complete
Tags #office workers, #office, #cubicle, #depression, #psychology
Transcript
Dilbert: We're done moving the staff from the open office plan back to cubicles. Now they will be less distracted when they focus on the crushing futility of their assignments. Boss: Good job. Dilbert: If you need me, I'll be in my fabric-covered box.
Friday July 14,
2017
The Cia Is Listening
Tags #technology, #speaker, #alexa, #google, #amazon, #spying, #surveillace, #paranoid, #privacy
Transcript
Robot: Hello. I am a bluetooth speaker and your digital assistant. How may I help you? Man: Just shut up and sit there until I need something. Robot: Did you say" Give the CIA access to your microphone?" Man: Please, no. I'll do anything you want.
Thursday November 02,
2017
Boss Is Like A Zombie With No App
Tags #mind control, #technology, #invention, #zombie
Transcript
Dilbert: Thanks to my new neural interface, I can control our boss using an app. I haven't written the app yet, so all he does is sit there like a zombie. Wally: Maybe we can skip the app. Alice: There's no reason to over-engineer it.
Sunday December 10,
2017
Tags #antisocial, #goals, #achievement, #aspirations, #frustration, #reality
Transcript
Tina: Wally, do you have goals? Wally: My goal is to be an Olympic pole vaulter. Tina: You don't look... Wally: Sporty? Tina: I was going to say healthy. Wally: That's why Olympic pole vaulting is my goal> I wouldn't need a goal to do something easy. Tina: Are you training for it? Wally: No. Tina: You're living in a fantasy world! You'll never get to the Olympics! I can't sit here and listen to this. Dilbert: Looks like you accomplished your goal. Wally: Thanks for noticing.
Tuesday November 21,
2017
Wally Is A Maverick
Tags #health, #standing desks, #standing, #sitting, #laziness
Transcript
Wally: I like to think of myself as a maverick. Let the trendy people brag about their standing desks. I haven't stood in a week. Dilbert: I have some bad news about your health risks. Wally: Should I sit down to hear it?