Make Tie Comic Strips - Page 80

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Make Tie

View 791 - 800 results for make tie comic strips. Discover the best "Make Tie" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dogcart the ceo, #420 times, #smarter, #system is flawed, #contradicting your boss

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert the CEO Dogbert says, "I earn 420 times what you make. That means I'm 420 times smarter." A man says, "Actually, it means the system is deeply flawed." Dogbert says, "If you were 420 times smarter, you wouldn't be contradicting your boss right now."

Top Dilbert Searches

marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #addicted to internet, #doctor, #interesting, #internet, #medicine, #offcie, #pill, #underlying probelm, #medical, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I'm addicted to the internet because it's more interesting than people. Is there a pill you can give to everyone else to make them more interesting? Doctors never want to treat the underlying problem.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boss, #budget, #clothes, #drastic budget cuts, #dramatic, #how much cut, #buzzards seem selective

View Transcript

Transcript

Finance troll: We need to make drastic budget cuts. The boss: Let's not get all dramatic. Just tell me how much to cut and I'll make it happen. Dilbert: On the plus side,, the buzzards seem selective.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #office workers, #valuable, #value, #legacy system, #less valuable, #never appear less valuable, #dress code troll

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I worry that being assigned to work on the legacy systems will make me appear less valuable in the future. Catbert: You have my word that you could never appear less valuable than you are now. Gilbert: Why do your assurances make me feel worse? Catbert: Your new dress code is "troll."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #complain, #garbage, #job, #trash, #new assignment, #troll in charge, #legacy systems, #shouldn't complain, #economy, #free bag of garbage, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: My new assignment is "troll in charge of the legacy systems." I guess I shouldn't complain. I'm lucky to have a job in this economy. Garbageman: Would a free bag of garbage make you feel better? Dilbert: A little.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #support group, #gullible, #tricking, #leader, #controlling, #uniforms

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert says, "I'm forming a support group for people who always make bad choices." Ratbert says, "Count me in!" Dogbert says, "Ratbert, I want you to organize the whole thing for me." Ratebrt says, "I'd like that, and I don't know why." Dogbert says, "I want everyone to wear uniforms and chant my name." Ratbert says, "Is it just me, or does this keep getting better?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #club, #bad decisions, #embarassed, #disguise, #mustache

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert says, "Welcome to Dogbert's society for people who always make bad decisions." Dogbert says, "I'd like to thank each of you for choosing the platinum stain protection plan with your membership dues." Dogbert says, "If your reputations gets stained by being in this group, the brochure will teach you how grow a mustache disguise." <Man says, "What if I already have one?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #informing, #admitting, #laziness, #bragging, #shocked

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally says, "We've never worked together so let me tell you how this will go down." Wally says, "You'll expect me to contribute, and you will be disappointed at every turn. In the long run you will do everything yourself." Woman says, "How do you stay employed?" Wally says, "DOn't make me call myself a genius."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #chain letter, #e-mail, #die, #panic, #friends, #negotiating, #fifty, #superstitious

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "Oh no. If I don't forward this e-mail to fifty friends, I'll die within a week." The Boss says, "I don't have that many friends! I need to make more friends, and fast!!!" Dilbert says, "What are you sending him now?" Wally says, "I'm upping it to sixty friends."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #hospital, #ductwork, #shot out, #survived, #alive, #pointy hair, #cushion, #cool machines, #bed, #play, #fiddle, #disrupt, #medical

View Transcript

Transcript

Doctor says, "He survived because his pointy hair cushioned the impact." Doctor says, "Please resist the urge to fiddle with the cool machines that keep him alive." Alice says, "Maybe we can make him smarter." Wally says, "What's this do?"