Sat Down Wrong Comic Strips - Page 82

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

887 Results for Sat Down Wrong

View 811 - 820 results for sat down wrong comic strips. Discover the best "Sat Down Wrong" comics from Dilbert.com.

Your Word Against Everyone

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Your Word Against Everyone - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #accusation, #assume, #assumption, #Opinion

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Everyone says you hate the new product test plan. Dilbert: No, I like it. Boss: Pffft. I don't think all of those people can be wrong about what you think. Dilbert: I'm kind of an expert on what I think. Boss: I guess it's just your word against everyone.

Wally Enjoys Listening To Himself

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally Enjoys Listening To Himself - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Wally, #talking, #coffee, #boring, #moment

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I recently realized how much I enjoy listening to myself talk. The alternative involves listening to people who are boring and wrong about everything. Dilbert: That's not... Wally: Shhh! Don't ruin a perfect moment.

Dilbert Offers To Help

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert Offers To Help - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #help, #project, #sucker, #woman employee

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Our pointy-haired boss asked me to help you on your project. Woman Employee: Yes!! My dream of getting paid while other people do my work is becoming a reality! Dilbert: I might have played this wrong. Woman employee: Sucker!

Looking In The Wrong Places

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Looking In The Wrong Places - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #couch, #co-worker, #wimp, #empathy, #wrong, #places

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I offered to help a co-worker, and she started delegating tasks to me like I'm her subordinate. Dogbert: Is the point of your boring story that your co-worker is a natural leader and you're a wimp. Dilbert: I was looking for some empathy. Dogbert: Is your point that you look for things in the wrong places?

Unmotivated Staff

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Unmotivated Staff - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Catbert, #the boss, #wrong, #leadership, #skills

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: A few months ago, I realized my staff was unmotivated and working on all the wrong things. It took all of my leadership skills to get them motivated again. Catbert: Are they still doing the wrong things? The Boss: Faster than ever.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #data, #Dilbert, #internet, #jerry, #tweet, #weasel

View Transcript

Transcript

Jerry: Omg! You are soooo wrong! I literally cannot believe you are this gullible. Hahahahaha! Hahahaha! I can't wait to tweet about your stupidity. Your dumbness will live forever on the internet! Dilbert: You probably haven't seen the new data that proves I'm right. Will you apologize like a decent human being or will you move the goalposts claim victory. And trash my name like a demented weasel? Jerry: Can you tell me more about the weasel option?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Wally, #the boss, #bad, #technology, #day, #phone, #freezing, #printer, #working, #network, #warning, #lights, #christmas, #tree, #laptop, #boot, #coincidence, #permission, #lock, #lead-line, #box, #hero

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I'm having a bad technology day. My phone keeps freezing, my printer isn't working, and our network is down. Wally: My car's warning lights look like a Christmas tree, and my laptop won't boot up. Maybe its all just coincidence but I don't think we can take that chance. May I have permission to lock myself in a lead-lined box to protect the rest of the company? The Boss: How will I know you're really in a lead-lined box? Wally: YOu'll know because your phone will be working fine. The Boss: My phone is still working that man is a hero.

Making Your Boss Look Good

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Making Your Boss Look Good - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boss, #criticism, #ego, #managers & supervisors, #office workers, #responsibility

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: You did this wrong. Dilbert: That's how you trained me to do it. Bob: You need to learn to take responsibility for my mistakes. It's called "making your boss look good". Dilbert: Maybe you could help a little too.

No Internet

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
No Internet - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #complaining, #engineering, #office workers, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: The network will be down all day, but try to do what you can without it. Dilbert: What can we do without it besides drink coffee, complain, and whittle? Boss: No knives at work. Dilbert: Hold off on the whittling.

How Long To Make Ai

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
How Long To Make Ai  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #computers, #engineering, #intelligence, #office workers, #sarcasm, #technology, #robots, #humans

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: How long would it take you to create artificial intelligence that is as smart as humans? Dilbert: It shouldn't take me long to dumb-down a computer to human levels. Boss: What? Dilbert: It might take five minutes, tops.