Time Travel Comic Strips - Page 82
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1000 Results for Time Travel
View 811 - 820 results for time travel comic strips. Discover the best "Time Travel" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday May 19,
2008
Tags hands to boss, insensitive, plop, toss, worked all night, disregard, overlooked
Transcript
Dilbert: I worked all night to finish the assignments on time. The Boss: Toss it on the pile. Dilbert: I'd feel better if you used a different choice of words." The Boss: Plop it on the top.
Thursday June 05,
2008
Tags colossal waste, different light, less usless, unimportant, staff meetings
Transcript
Wally says, "I took a class on being less useless. Now I see the world in a different light." Wally says, "For example, I recognize these staff meetings as colossal wastes of time, but there's nothing I can do about them." Wally says, "Now my helplessness makes my uselessness seem unimportant."
Thursday June 19,
2008
Tags rumor control, paid per rumor, terrorit training campo, exotic dancer, weekends
Transcript
Dogbert says, "I'm from the Dogbert Rumor Control Service." Dogbert says, "People are saying Ted is an exotic male dancer on weekends. I know it isn't true because he spends all of his free time in a terrorist training camp." Alice says, "Isn't that worse?" Dogbert says, "I get paid per rumor. It's not a perfect system."
Wednesday June 25,
2008
Tags lying, practice, productive, professional, vacation
Transcript
Dilbert says, "I'm in charge while our pointy-haired boss is on vacation." Dilbert says, "I expect each of you to be professional and productive during this time." Wally says, "Nice lying." Dilbert says, "I practiced in front of a mirror."
Wednesday July 16,
2008
Tags management, moral compass broken, nun, ceo, scientist, burning building, bidding war, science
Transcript
Catbert says, "I can't put you on the management fast track until I confirm that your moral compass is broken." Catbert says, "A nun, a CEO and a scientist are in a burning building. You can only save one of them. Which one do you save?" Dilbert says, "Is there time for a bidding war?" Catbert says, "Oh, you're good."
Wednesday August 06,
2008
Tags ergonomically correct, evil director, human services, job perfomance, chairs, wellness related
Transcript
Catbert: Evil Director of Human Resources Catbert says, "Our concern for wellness is related to your job performance." Catbert says, "Obviously you won't be getting an ergonomically correct chair any time soon." Catbert says, "And feel free to type as hard as you want."
Saturday August 09,
2008
Tags security software, insisting, critical updates, critical upadtes, no win
Transcript
Wally says, "My security software kept insisting that I download critical updates." Wally says, "I didn't have time to do all that, and I couldn't risk using my computer without critical updates. It was a no-win situation." The Boss says, "Did you accomplish anything this week?" Wally says, "What part of 'no-win' is confusing you?"
Wednesday September 10,
2008
Tags bought entire era system, software, money, boat sinkiing, anchor to head, staff, out of money, engineering
Transcript
The Boss says, "We inadvertently bought an entire ERP system without any software. Now we're out of money." Asok says, "Why do I suddenly feel like my boat is sinking and someone nailed an anchor to my head?" The Boss says, "If only someone on my staff could write the software in his spare time..." Asok says, "Glub glub glub"
Thursday September 11,
2008
Tags impossible task, forbidden powers, third arm, lost intellectual curiosity
Transcript
Asok thinks, "My task is impossible unless I use my forbidden powers." Asok thinks, "Would anyone notice if I had a third arm for a few hours?" Wally says, "I lost my intellectual curiosity just in time."
Friday September 12,
2008
Tags worked around clock, ten programmers, establish new baseline, tragic death march, stretch golas, stupid
Transcript
Asok says, "I worked around the clock and finished a project that would normally require ten programmers." Asok says, "Um... did I just establish a new baseline expectation that will turn my job into a tragic death march?" The Boss says, "It's time to set some stretch goals." Asok says, "STUPID! STUPID! STUPID!"


