Asok Comic Strips - Page 83
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Character
964 Results for Asok
View 821 - 830 results for Asok comic strips. Discover the best "Asok" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday April 14,
2008
Tags cell phone, complaints, private office, threat, technology
Transcript
Alice : Loud Howard insists on using his speak-phone in his cubicle. You have to do something about it. The Boss: "I'll move him to a private office that just became available. Problem solved. Alice: I need to punch you until we both forget what happened here." Asok: Gaaa!!! Dilbert: Spare the glasses.
Friday May 16,
2008
Tags approved vendor list, boss, no one relaible, reliable
Transcript
Dilbert: Do you have the approved vendor list?" Secretary: Hmmm, Alice and Asok asked for that list too Are you one of three people assigned to the same project because your boss believes none of you are reliable?" " Dilbert: Maybe. Secretay: Hmmm, and you're the last one to ask for the list.
Wednesday June 25,
2008
Tags lying, practice, productive, professional, vacation
Transcript
Dilbert says, "I'm in charge while our pointy-haired boss is on vacation." Dilbert says, "I expect each of you to be professional and productive during this time." Wally says, "Nice lying." Dilbert says, "I practiced in front of a mirror."
Saturday July 19,
2008
Tags new job, miserable and helpless, Women, attracted to men, salary ranges, trophy wives, carnival skanks
Transcript
Dilbert's moral compass is damaged. Dilbert says, "My new job is to make employees feel miserable and helpless." Dilbert says, "Here's a chart that shows the sort of women that are attracted to men at various salary ranges." Dilbert says, "Trophy wives are at the top, obviously, and down in your range we have the carnival skanks."
Wednesday September 03,
2008
Tags adopting best practices, industry, mediocrity, mediocre, practices
Transcript
The Boss says, "We will be adopting the best practices in our industry, just like everyone else." Dilbert says, "If everyone is doing it, best practices is the same thing as mediocre." The Boss says, "STOP MAKING MEDIOCRITY SOUND BAD!" Dilbert says, "Sorry."
Saturday November 01,
2008
Tags change is good, most start ups fail, questions at end
Transcript
The Boss says, "Change is good." Dilbert says, "Then why do most startups fail?" The Boss says, "I only take questions at the end." Someone says, "There's more?"
Tuesday November 18,
2008
Tags meeting, message, sleeping, full attention, instant message, asleep, employing heuristics, business
Transcript
The boss: I don't think I have your full attention. Alice: It's Asok's turn to listen. If you say anything useful, he'll send us an instance message. The boss: He's asleep. Alice: He's employing heuristics.
Saturday November 29,
2008
Tags budget cut, health, bleak, public, poorly made prodcuts, elevant, organs, still healthy, black market
Transcript
After Budget cuts The boss: It might seem bleak now, but things will turn around... As soon as the public starts loving poorly made products that are relevant to a bygone era. In the meantime, who has organs that are still healthy enough to sell on the black market?
Friday February 05,
2010
Tags security, canceled, accident, help, scared, nervous, ductwork, forage, stale donuts, manage, small vent
Transcript
The Boss says, "Asok, my security clearance was accidentally canceled. I need your help." Asok says, "Maybe you could live in the ductwork, and forage for stale donuts after dark." The Boss says, "How can I fit in there?" Asok says, "Try foraging as effectively as you manage."
Tuesday February 16,
2010
Tags ombudsman, devil, helen fry, job, management, complaint, issue, pitchfork, business
Transcript
The Boss says, "Helen, we're looking for a new ombudsman. Your experience in the afterlife makes you an ideal candidate." Helen says, "I'll take the job. But call me Mrs. Fry." Asok says, "I have an issue with management." The Boss says, "Go to Helen Fry." Yes, I know it's an old joke


