Next Year Comic Strips - Page 84
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881 Results for Next Year
View 831 - 840 results for next year comic strips. Discover the best "Next Year" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday April 24,
2019
Be More Like Alice
Tags complain, office, office workers, pay raise
Transcript
the boss: i can't give you a raise because you didn't do anything noteworthy this year. dilbert: it only seems that way because i'm so good at my job that i make it look easy and never complain. alice visually upset and yelling: my job is a nightmare!!! the boss: why can't you be more like alice?
Sunday May 26,
2019
Tags business, employees, office, office workers, pay raise, employee of the year
Transcript
the boss: i'm looking for nominations for employee of the year. the boss: does anyone have a suggestion? dilbert: hypothetically, would the winner of this award be likely to get a larger-than-normal pay raise? the boss: i would think so, yes. dilbert: and is it true that our budget for raises is limited? the boss: yes, of course. dilbert: would it not be against my best interests to nominate an employee who is competing with me for scarce resources? the boss: let's just forget i brought it up. dilbert: i nominate myself.
Thursday May 30,
2019
If You Can Dream
Friday May 31,
2019
Go Hard Or Go Home
Tags boss, business, inspirational quote
Transcript
the boss: your inspirational quote of the day is... next frame is outside of office building: "go hard or go home." the boss in empty conference room: i shouldn't have made it sound like a choice.
Tuesday June 11,
2019
Leadership And Guessing
Tags business, coffee, managers & supervisors, office
Transcript
alice to the boss: one option is to use the old method that has never once worked, but we think we know how to make it work next time. alice: the other option is to try something new that we can't be sure will work. alice: it's almost as if leadership is nothing but guessing. the boss drinking coffee: let's change the subject.
Monday August 12,
2019
Leadership Conference In Maui
Tags boss, irritation, managers & supervisors, vacations
Transcript
Boss: The leadership conference is in Maui next week. I need you to sit in for me...and do your own job at the same time. While I'm drinking on the beach. Dilbert: I get it!!!
Sunday September 01,
2019
Boss Makes Document Suggestions
Tags boss, employees, frustrated, managers & supervisors, office workers, report, sarcasm
Transcript
Boss: Run this by Tina before you send it out. Dilbert: I already did. Boss: Make sure legal signs off on it. Dilbert: They did. Boss: Add the revenue graph from Alice's slide deck. Dilbert: It's in the exhibits in the back. Boss: You need to compare this plan to the "do nothing" option. Dilbert: That's on the next page. Boss: I need you to change something on this document so my life has meaning. Dilbert: I put a misspelled word on page seven for you. Boss: Fix it.
Tuesday September 03,
2019
Wally Covers For Boss
Tags boss, business, managers & supervisors, motivation, vacations
Transcript
Boss: I need you to fill in for me while I'm on vacation. I would have asked someone competent, but they're all on vacation next week, too. Please don't destroy the entire company. Wally: Do I seem that motivated?
Saturday September 07,
2019
Centralizing The Decentralized
Tags boss, business, managers & supervisors, office workers, sarcasm, value
Transcript
Boss: I need to randomly change something so it seems as if being a manager is a real job. Maybe I should centralize all the functions I decentralized last year. Catbert: Or you could find a way to add value. Boss: I'm not magic.
Sunday October 13,
2019
Performance Versus Pay
Tags angry, big business, employees, irritation, managers & supervisors, money, salary
Transcript
Boss: I can't give you a bonus this year because we paid too much to buy another company. Dilbert: Are you saying my efforts and my rewards are no longer linked? Boss: Noooo. I'm not saying anything like that. I'm just saying your compensation isn't influenced by your performance. Dilbert: That's the same thing! Boss: Teamwork means we all share the rewards and we all have to share the pain. Dilbert: Does that mean management won't be getting bonuses either? Boss: Now you've made it awkward.