Has Three Ears Comic Strips - Page 86

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View 851 - 860 results for has three ears comic strips. Discover the best "Has Three Ears" comics from Dilbert.com.

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"I heard that you're a certified project management zombie. Is that true?" "I'm an assertive and innovative professional, experienced in project and operations management methodology and process development." "He didn't seem dangerous." "I just sat through a three-hour project review meeting."

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The Land of Unrealistic Business Assumptions $ GOLD (Take Some) "Suddenly I feel as if anything is possible." "Hello! We're the consumers who have extraordinarily bad judgment!" "I need more than three of you." "The hole's a thousand miles deep. The others thought it would be a good idea to come early." "Ow! Ow!"

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"Welcome to Dogbert's seminar on work-life balance." "First, review this list of your priorities." Family Job Exercise Vacation Must-Dos Medical Eating Hygiene Sleep Romance Holidays "You have time for three things. Work and holidays are two. You get to pick the third."

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Tags #loud guy section, #no loud guy, #date, #man screams, #stories, #noise, #restaurant, #customers, #hostess, #table nearby

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Would you like to be seated in the loud guy section or no loud guy? Menu "They both sound good. We'll try the loud guy section." "I hope he has good stories." "AND THEN!"

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Tags #assistant, #mood, #frustration, #ignore, #ignoring, #attitude, #psychology

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"Carol, I need some three-ring binders and a reservation for the conference room on Thursday." "I don't like the way you asked, so I'm going to make a phone call until you give up and leave." "Yeah, the big jerk is still standing there."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #engineer, #infeasibility, #second opinion, #engineering

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"Dilbert says my plan won't work. I need a second opinion." "Hypothetically, if I say your plan is terrific, would I end up being the engineer who has to implement it?" "Maybe." "Your plan reeks of infeasibility."

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Topper "I had to carry over three weeks of vacation." "That's nothing!" "I carried over so much time that they had to create a new month and name it after me!" "Shut your pie hole!" "It looks as if someone is having a bad topperuary."

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Google Headquarters "Isn't it a little bit evil to kill Dilbert with our death ray?" "Good point...What if I just blast the space station out of orbit and make it land on his house?" "I'll bet you ten billion dollars you can't." "And the lower has to introduce himself as 'the dumb one.'"

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"Wally, my job has been outsourced to India." "That's interesting because you came here from India." "Did you already think of that?" "YES!"

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"Wally, I came to ask you for the new design specs." "But we both know you'll send me to someone who doesn't have them, and that person will refer me back to you." "When I return, you will have escaped to your secret hiding place." "Ted has the specs."