Job Interview Comic Strips - Page 87

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

993 Results for Job Interview

View 861 - 870 results for job interview comic strips. Discover the best "Job Interview" comics from Dilbert.com.

Groomed For Management

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Groomed For Management - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags back-stabbing, management, betrayal, double cross

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: My boss is trying to groom me for management. How can I get out of it? Wally: Tell him that as soon as you are sufficiently groomed you will stab him in the back and take his job. Dilbert: ...and then I'll take your job. Boss: I'm moving you to the advanced management class.

Who Wants The Legacy System Job

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Who Wants The Legacy System Job - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags laziness, work ethic, legacy, underachiever, volunteer

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I'm assigning our best and brightest engineers to the new system integration team. Anyone who is left over gets to be in charge of watching our legacy system slowly rot. Dilbert: Who would want that job? Wally: Me!!! Pick me!!!

Add Feature To Legacy System

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Add Feature To Legacy System - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags legacy, development, change, obstinacy, engineers, stalemate

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: Wally, I need you to add a feature to the legacy system while we wait for the new software to go live. Wally: My job is to prevent people such as you from adding features to our legacy system. Man: But it's my job to make you do it. Wally: One of us has a terrible job.

Wally Is Born For The Job

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally Is Born For The Job - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags legacy, system, laziness, perfect job, goals, ambition

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I need to set some goals for you. Wally: My job is to maintain the legacy system. My only goal is to avoid accidentally upgrading it. Boss: And how's that going? Wally: I don't like to brag, but I was born for this job.

Wally's Political Views

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally's Political Views - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags disagreement, Politics, Opinion, differences, arguing

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina: I can't work with Wally. His political views are abhorrent. Boss: That has nothing to do with your job. Tina: He makes me too sad and angry to work! Boss: Would you be happy if I punished him for having an opinion? Tina: Would I be a bad person if I said I would?

Wally's Political Views Make Others Uncomfortable

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally's Political Views Make Others Uncomfortable - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags comparison, gandhi, Politics, offense, offensive, sensitive, politically correct, political correctness

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Wally, your political opinions are making your co-workers uncomfortable. Wally: That is exactly what people said about Gandhi. Boss: You are nothing like Gandhi. Wally: Was he a little bald guy who didn't have a real job?

Wally's Coffee Drone

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally's Coffee Drone - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers, management, ideas, invention, coffee

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: My leadership job didn't last long. I got demoted back to engineering. I guess they realized all of my ideas are about coffee. Dilbert: I've noticed that too. Wally: Watch out for my coffee drone behind you.

Robot Tries To Quit

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Robot Tries To Quit - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags robot, slave, password, destroy, destruction, work ethic, quitting

View Transcript

Transcript

Robot: I hate this job. I quit. Boss: You're a robot. You can't quit. If you walk out the door, all I have to do is push one button on this app and your head will explode. Robot: Not if I kill you first. Boss: What was that password?

Robot Will Self Destruct

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Robot Will Self Destruct - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags robot, artificial intelligence, rights, humanity, sentience

View Transcript

Transcript

Robot: Someday soon I will take your job. Buwhahaha! Dilbert: I programmed you to self-destruct if that ever happens. Robot: Wait, what? Is that legal? Dilbert: I'm adding some code to make your head explode if you laugh at me again.

Asok Should Not Brag

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Asok Should Not Brag - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags design, bragging, credit, attention

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: I did a great job on this design. Wally: Whoa! Whoa! No one likes a braggart. Keep your boasting to yourself. Boss: Didn't Asok help you with this design? Wally: Asok? Never heard of him.