Alice Threat Comic Strips - Page 87

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Alice Threat

View 861 - 870 results for alice threat comic strips. Discover the best "Alice Threat" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #products saftyproblem, #murderer, #killer, #swallowed a squirrel, #scone

View Transcript

Transcript

Ask: "Alice, if I fail to blow the whistle on our product's safety product, I will be like a murderer!" Alice: "No, technically you'd be more like a killer, you wuss." Asok: "My guts feel like I swallowed a squirrel." Alice: "You have totally sucked the flavor out of this scone."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #80 hour week, #crazy talk, #less work, #loofah, #evil director, #human resources, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: Evil Director of Human Resources Alice: Im working 80 hours a week. I barely have time to bathe. Catbert: try using your tongue during meetings, Its like a bath and a loofah all in one. Alice: Or I could do less work. Catbert: Thats crazy talk.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #email storage, #server, #document

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: You've exceeded your e-mail storage allocation on the server again. Alice: Thats because I od real work as opposed to walking around with a piece of paper. The boss: Its not a piece of paper: its a document! Alice: I can't hear you over the ousted of my real work.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #check, #forgiveness, #philosophy, #rip out heart, #seek forgiveness, #ask permission, #internet, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: Gaaa!!! How could you do this without checking with me??!! My philosophy is that its better to seek forgiveness than to ask for permission. Dilbert: did he say you could rip out hi heart and sell it on the internet? Alice: Kinda.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #invoice, #preferred vendor system, #quality product, #scowl, #small biuinessman

View Transcript

Transcript

I may be a small businessman but I can provide a quality product to your company. The Boss: I'll ask alice to show you how to get into our referred vendor system. Alice: He can already invoice! Wally: he has your scowl.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #admire, #performance over appearence, #fist of death, #mean, #coworkers

View Transcript

Transcript

wally: "You know what I admire about you, Alice?" "You obviously value performance over appearance." Alice: "Thank you." "Wait... If that was a compliment, why is my fist of death tingling?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #stalking new hire, #date tomorrow, #employee orientation, #workplace hazards

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: hows your stalking of the new hire going? Wally: we have a date for tomorrow. Alice: She's in an employee orientation meeting today. wally: Uh - oh. Module four is about identifying workplace hazards.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #improve communication, #imitates boss, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: I called this meeting so I could tell you the division's goals for next year. Alice: Thats a good idea because we're all so dumb that we coldly possibly read this in email. Goal one: Improve communication. ALiceL I can't. Im too dumb.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #team assignments, #mprotant things, #ruined meeting, #clueless nimrods, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: "Alice, I've been told that you ignore your team's assignments and work on things that aren't your job." Alice: "That's true. I do important things instead of useless things assigned by clueless nimrods." The Boss: "You totally ruined this meeting."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #fax to voice line, #prank, #on purpose, #pain, #bother, #harass, #anger, #mad

View Transcript

Transcript

Hello? This is Alice. BEEEP BEEEP You are faxing to my voice line gain you #!!%* Dilbert: How often do you fax to her voice line? wally: It depends if she's been bad.