Office Tour Comic Strips - Page 87

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

967 Results for Office Tour

View 861 - 870 results for office tour comic strips. Discover the best "Office Tour" comics from Dilbert.com.

Body Language Fail

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Body Language Fail - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #body language, #fail, #deny, #psychology, #monster

View Transcript

Transcript

female office worker: i can tell by your body language that you want me to fail. dilbert: why would i want you to fail? female: you're not denying it!!! dilbert: well, now i want you to fail. female yelling: you're a monster!

Top Dilbert Searches

marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac

Business Agility Influencer

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Business Agility Influencer - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #office workers, #business, #agility, #solution, #meaningless, #useless

View Transcript

Transcript

ted: hi, i'm a business agility influencer and solutionist wally: i don't think that means anything ted: why are you the first person to spot that? wally: because i'm useless too!

Microaggressions

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Microaggressions - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #office workers, #human resources, #micro aggressions, #hire, #engineer

View Transcript

Transcript

catbert: someone reported you to human resources for all of your micro aggressions dilbert: what would be an example of one? catbert: it doesn't matter dilbert: it feels as of to should matter catbert: this is why engineers never get hired for human resources

Dogbert's Sensitivity Training

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dogbert's Sensitivity Training - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #office workers, #class, #training, #sensitivity, #offend, #kill, #hour

View Transcript

Transcript

dogbert: welcome to dogcart's sensitivity training dogbert passing out papers: today you will learn how to never offend anyone ever again class including dilbert: are you going to kill us? dogbert: no, no, no. after an hour of this class, you'll want to do it yourself.

Dilbert Murders Robots

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert Murders Robots - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #office workers, #business, #robot, #technology, #human resources, #bad behavior, #reboot, #murder, #plot, #erase

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: last week i upgraded our robot's social awareness module. it immediately reported me to human resources for unspecified bad behavior. so i murdered the robot by erasing its memory and rebooting it. but another robot told it what happened, and then both of them plotted to kill me. so i erased the memory from both robots and then rebooted them. but a third robot found out about the first two, and now the entire robot community sees me as a serial killer. so i released a computer virus to kill every robot in the world, just to play it safe. wally: what happened to the lights? dilbert: uh-oh. i missed one.

The Best Way To Succeed

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
The Best Way To Succeed - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #office workers, #success, #delegate

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: the best way to succeed in this world is through hard work dilbert: is that the way you did it? boss: no, i used the second-best way dilbert: which is... boss: making other people work hard

Workflow Training

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Workflow Training - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #office workers, #system, #technology, #training, #new

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: has everyone taken the new workflow system training? alice: yes, and we all concluded the new system is poorly designed and should be abandoned. boss: sounds like you need more training. alice: i meant to say we love the new system

Stay Home When Sick

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Stay Home When Sick - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #office workers, #healthy, #sick, #sneeze, #infect, #deadlines

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: maybe you should stay home when you are sick. alice sneezing: honk! i will, but first i need to infect the rest of you so i'm not the only one missing deadlines. can you hold this for me? (passes off tissue to dilbert)

Boss Helps

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Boss Helps - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #project, #deadline, #interruption, #business, #new, #task, #priority

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: why isn't your project done yet? dilbert: because every time i walk past your office you give me three new tasks and tell men they are my highest priority. boss: i was hoping you didn't know why. dilbert: hire someone dumber next time.

Conference Call

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Conference Call - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #office workers, #business, #conference call, #meeting, #useful, #don't care

View Transcript

Transcript

wally: how did your conference call go? dilbert: normal. it took us twenty minutes to get everyone connected, followed by forty minutes of garbled speech that no one understood. the meeting ended when everyone got tired of pretending something useful was happening. wally: i didn't really care.