New Contract Comic Strips - Page 89

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for New Contract

View 881 - 890 results for new contract comic strips. Discover the best "New Contract" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

"Hi. I'm your new nemesis." "The nemesis function used to be handled informally. Now it's a profession, kind of like project management." "Stand by while I prepare my nemesis face and look for reasons to thwart you." sigh

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

"Here's the problem: Our salesman, Lyin' John, sold you a system that we can't install without losing money." "I propose that you pay us 40% more than we quoted you in the contract, and everyone wins." "Her body language says she's thinking about it." CRACK!!!

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

My new strategy is to hire passionate people instead of smart ones. "I curse the air conditioning system that blows such a cold wind!" "I can already feel our stock price going up."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

"So, Asok, what have you heard about Ted's project?" "He seems to be in over his head and he's blaming you for cutting the wrong budget." "I hope this doesn't come back to bite me." "Now now, Carol. I'm working my new snitch."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

"Alice, this is Ellen, your new natural enemy." "You're highly skilled but mannish, whereas Ellen is unqualified and totally hot." "Now I have to decide who will come with me to the trade show in Hawaii and who will do the furniture inventory."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

That new employee is getting special treatment just because she's hot. It's unfair. "She's hot? Where is her cubicle? Maybe I should bring her some coffee." "Do you mind brewing an extra pot? I don't know how big her mug is."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

"The new employee at work is hot, and she's getting special treatment. How can I get rid of her?" "Water finds its own level. She'll leave within a week." "They say that most people meet their future spouses at work." erk!

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

"I cannot decide if you are very wise or just a big stupid moron." "Well, I'll tell you, little cowpoke, when the snake falls in love with the spaghetti, it's time to buy a new hat." "You look more flustered than a barefoot squirrel at a tire store." "Gaaa!!! They almost make sense!!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

"Wally, the marketing department requested your help." "Me?" "Our new product is worthless, much like yourself. They figured you'd have some insight." "All it does is occupy space and smell bad." "Well, it's definitely a gift item."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

"Tina, you were only supposed to document our product status, not rewrite the entire scope." "Our CEO loves the new project scope. We'll expect you to do that without extra resources." "Is this a 'neener-neener' situation or more of a 'Who's your daddy?'?"