Make Goal Comic Strips - Page 9

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Make Goal

View 81 - 90 results for make goal comic strips. Discover the best "Make Goal" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 04, 2003's comic on:

Tags #level conscious, #vide presidents offcie, #secretary, #make direct eye contact, #meeting, #boss, #new hire, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

"We're not 'level conscious' here." "You could walk up to any vice president's office and talk to his secretary as if you were an equal." "Which, by the way, you're not. So don't try to make direct eye contact."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 14, 2003's comic on:

Tags #make changes, #skills database, #know as guy, #avoid work, #too much work

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina: "Wally, can you show me how to make changes to the skills database?" Wally: "I can't risk being known as the guy who knows how to edit the database." Tina: "Because?" Wally: "I barely have time to avoid the work I already have."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 21, 2004's comic on:

Tags #make changes, #no credibility, #idiots, #phone call, #boss offcie

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: "I told Matthew that there was no way we could make those changes." "Ring." The Boss: "Hi, Matthew!... Yes, of course we can make those changes; we're not idiots! Ha ha!!" Dilbert: "He says you have no credibility."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 30, 2004's comic on:

Tags #deadly product, #sued, #did nothing, #public realtions, #goal, #jury pool, #victims deserved it, #moral implications, #strategy

View Transcript

Transcript

"Dogbert does PR." "You knew your product was deadly but you did nothing until you were sued." "The goal of public relations is to taint the jury pool, we'll show that the victims had it coming." "Maybe we should discuss the moral implications of that strategy." "Bah!"

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 20, 2004's comic on:

Tags #sycophant school, #agree with superiors, #make statements, #fake smiles, #paid 400x more, #look at faces, #rude, #teaching, #aggressive, #education

View Transcript

Transcript

SYCOPHANT SCHOOL "You must learn to agree with your superiors no matter what they say." "For practice, I'll make statements and you agree. Remember to use your fake smiles." "Statement one: I should be paid 400 times more than you because I have to look at your faces."

Dilbert Characters

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 21, 2004's comic on:

Tags #make ted quit, #aggressive replacement, #share resources, #job unbearable, #pants, #in same pants

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss: I hate Ted. How can I make him quit? Catbert: "That's easy." "Hire an aggressive replacement for Ted who will share his resources and make his job unbearable." Ted: "These are my pants." "Are you still here?"

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 11, 2005's comic on:

Tags #stock - picking software, #more feauture, #make hair grow, #bald guys, #test on rat, #butticks

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: My stock-picking software needs more features. "I think I'll add a module that claims to make hair grow on bald guys. I'll first test it on a rat." Ratbert: "I feel a new one on my buttocks!" Dogbert: "That's all the proof I need."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 25, 2005's comic on:

Tags #ceo, #major corproation, #dream, #risk taker, #achieves goal

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert's Executive Search Firm "Ratbert, would you like to be the CEO of a major corporation?" "That had always been my dream...until I found this extension cord to gnaw on. Now I'm committed to seeing it through." "He's a risk taker who won't stop until h achieves his goal."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 01, 2007's comic on:

Tags #dog senslved, #basement, #make running shoes, #eyes, #inexpensive, #footwear

View Transcript

Transcript

ELbonian: "Please help me. Your dog has enslaved my people in your basement and forced us to make running shoes!" Dilbert: "GAAA!!! MY EYES!!!" pssst "I like to help people, but I also like inexpensive footwear."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 04, 2007's comic on:

Tags #barbecue, #freinds, #no freinds, #make freinds, #jogger, #desparte, #meat, #social skills, #no social skills, #random, #Advice

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Maybe I should invite some friends over for a barbecue. Dogbert: "You don't have any friends." Dilbert: "Good point. Maybe I should make some friends first." Dogbert: "Exactly." Dogbert:"Do you like meat?"