Mind Out Of Niche Comic Strips - Page 9

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View 81 - 90 results for mind out of niche comic strips. Discover the best "Mind Out Of Niche" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting with boss, #speak frankly, #problems in dept, #ask out

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Alice says to the Boss, "I scheduled a meeting with your boss." The Boss looks startled. Alice continues, "He'll probably ask me to speak frankly about any problems in the department." The Boss thinks to himself, "This couldn't get any worse." Alice says to the Boss, "He's cute. I might ask him out."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #clear mind, #thoughts, #forward basis, #market space, #done practicing

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As Dilbert knocks at his door, The Boss thinks, "I must clear my mind of all thoughts." The Boss says, "At the end of the day we'll be in a market space on a going forward basis." The Boss says, "Om... Om... Page..." Dilbert says, "I'll come back when you're done practicing being useless."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #motivation fairy, #work hard, #gain respect, #peers, #avoid stress, #out live peers, #hard work

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THE MOTIVATION FAIRY: Hovering in the air near Wally, the Fairy says, "If you work hard, you will gain the respect of your peers." Wally says to the hovering Motivation Fairy, "If I avoid the stress of hard work, I will out-live my peers." The Fairy asks, "Hard work can kill me?" Wally answers, "If you're lucky."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #motivation fairy, #rewarding, #blurry vision, #long hors, #no raises, #no cubicle, #hair coming out, #wally fairy

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THE MOTIVATION FAIRY: The Fairy is sitting on top of Wally's computer monitor. Wally says, "It seems like your job isn't very rewarding." The Fairy, rubbing an eye, says, "Vision getting blurry." Wally says, "Long hours. No raises. No cubicle." The Fairy says, "Hair coming out in clumps." Wally watches as the Fairy flies away. The Fairy, looking exactly like Wally, with glasses and an almost bald head, says, "He's good. He's very good."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dating, #unattractive, #ugly, #woman fixes up, #project, #combover, #stay out of wind, #relationships

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Alice approaches Noriko who is sitting at her desk. Alice asks, "I'm dating an unattractive man. What should I do?" Noriko replies, "Every man is ugly until a woman fixes him up. Think of it as a project." Alice stands with a clipboard in hand as she lists her unattractive man's faults, who sits before her, obviously balding. She says, "Next, lose the combover, or at least stay out of the wind." The man asks, "How did you know about the combover?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #angry dumb guy, #Opinion, #beat it out, #self hurting

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Headline: The Angry Dumb Guy. Dilbert is sitting next to a male coworker. The coworker raises his arms and says, "If anyone wants my opinion..." Dilbert turns towards the coworker as he points to himself. The coworker continues, "...I'll beat it out of me!" Dilbert responds, "I want your opinion." The coworker turns to Dilbert, pulls his own tie with one hand and raises his other fist. He exclaims, "Oh yeah? Let's see if I have one!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #out of engineer, #more adminstrative, #write reports, #gradually shift, #writing reports, #vegetative

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Wally says to The Boss, "I'd like to make a gradual shift out of engineering and into something more administrative." Wally continues, "For example, I could write reports that tell other people how to do their jobs better." Wally concludes, "Then I could gradually shift out of writing reports and into something more vegetative."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #always a troll, #came to accounting, #had a look, #hair fell out, #horns and tail, #stopped gym, #finance troll, #accounting troll

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The troll sits at its computer. Dilbert asks, "Were you always a troll?" The troll responds, "No, this happened when I came to accounting." The troll continues, "First my hair fell out. Then I stopped going to the gym." Dilbert responds, "You have horns and a tail." The Troll replies, "When I realized I had a look going, I just went for it."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #circuit design, #mention, #didnt, #psychic, #conversation

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Dilbert is eating lunch with a female coworker. The coworker says, "Then I noticed that the circuit design looked like a bug. I was going to mention it but then I didn't." Dilbert exclaims, "I'm psychic!" Dilbert continues, "Unless you're saying out loud every thought that crosses your mind." The coworker gives the thumbs up and says, "It's called conversation."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dilbert as waiter, #hots on customer, #insults customer, #specials, #rude, #age

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Dilbert is waiting on a table. He says to the customer, "I'll be your server tonight... Whoa, you're beautiful." Dilbert continues, "Would your grandfather mind if I asked you out?" The customer replies, "He's my husband." Dilbert turns to the older man and says, "Moving right along, would you like to hear about our specials?"