Raise Hand Comic Strips - Page 9
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511 Results for Raise Hand
View 81 - 90 results for raise hand comic strips. Discover the best "Raise Hand" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday February 09,
2000
Tags face time, software, man makes face, imitating worker, discourage from raise, costs money, discouraging, engineering
Transcript
The Boss: Come in to the VP's office with me. you need to get some face time. Dilbert: What is Face Time? The Boss: Its very important. man: and this is you asking for a raise.
Monday July 10,
2000
Tags perfromance evaluation, 3% raise, earn a billion, steals as much
Transcript
The Boss says to Dilbert, "Write a performance evaluation for yourself." The Boss continues, "Shoot for about 3% raise...because that's what you're getting." Dilbert's computer states, "Dilbert's inventions will earn a billion dollars. But we think he steals almost as much."
Thursday November 16,
2000
Tags alice, hand, head, new temp, new temp likes, shakes hand on head
Transcript
New Temp: Its a pleasure to meet you Alice. OOWEE!! That was a good hand shake.
Friday November 17,
2000
Tags agency, get it, hand, joke, play on words, dogbert temp
Transcript
New Temp: Im from the DOgbert Temp agency, DO you need a hand? Dilbert: I get it, her her! New Temp: Get what? Dilbert: Then I said, "Don't get mad: try counting to fifteen" Wally: Ouch.
Saturday November 18,
2000
Tags blank copies, copied wrong sides, intern, new temp, talk to hand, tells off
Transcript
Asok: These copies you made for me are blank. New Temp: Thats because all the originals were blank. Asok: Maybe you could have checked the other sides, New temp: Talk to the hand.
Thursday March 15,
2001
Tags billion shares, dot com subsidary, fire everyone, presdient, raise, stock, promoting
Transcript
The Boss says to Dilbert, "I'm promoting you to president of our dot-com subsidiary." The Boss says to Dilbert, "Your job is to fire everyone." Dilbert asks, "Would I get a raise?" The Boss answers, "How does a billion shares of stock sound?"
Thursday May 03,
2001
Tags snails, offcie, slime trail, hand lotion, second sign, addicted, office
Transcript
Dilbert approaches Tina the Tech Writer. A piece of paper sticks to his hand. He says, "I think we have snails in the office." Dilbert holds the sheet of paper up and it appears to have something on it. Dilbert says, "There's a slime trail on everything." Dilbert exits and Tina stands on her desk chair to reach a giant pump labelled "Hand Lotion." Tina thinks, "That might be the second sign that I'm addicted to hand lotion."
Friday July 27,
2001
Tags bonus, did well, hiring freeze, shrink empire, hand shaking situation, hand, questioning clean
Transcript
Wally is sitting at his desk. The Boss approaches from behind with a check in hand. He says, "The company did well so you get a bonus despite the fact you did no work all year." After handing Wally the check, The Boss continues, "I'd fire you but I can't replace you because there's a hiring freeze and I don't want to shrink my empire." The Boss fidgets nervously and says, "This might be a hand-shaking situation but I don't know where your hand has been." Wally continues to stare at his check and brushes The Boss with, "Off you go."
Friday November 16,
2001
Tags use my raise, move from home, handicapped stall, storage facility, house warming, gift, flashlight, hesitate, call alice
Transcript
Dilbert, Wally, and Asok are eating lunch. Asok says, "I plan to use my raise to move my home in the handicapped stall to a storage facility." Asok continues, "If you are trying to think of a housewarming gift, I wouldn't say no to a flashlight." Wally says, "If you need help moving, don't hesitate to call Alice." Asok replies, "You are too kind."
Wednesday February 19,
2003
Tags 100 hrs a week, ask for raise, top secret facilit, super genius, resume, honest, take one, know one
Transcript
An interviewee says to The Boss, "If you hire me, I'll work a hundred hours a week and never ask for a raise!" The interviewee continues, "I went to school at a top-secret facility for super geniuses; that's why it's not on my resume." The Boss says to Catbert, "And I'm sure it's all true because he says he's honest!" Catbert replies, "Apparently it doesn't take one to know one."


