Stupid Questions Comic Strips - Page 9
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456 Results for Stupid Questions
View 81 - 90 results for stupid questions comic strips. Discover the best "Stupid Questions" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday December 21,
2000
Tags #incomprehensible accent, #won't ask questions, #coffee pot
Transcript
Wally, pouring a cup of coffee, says to Dilbert, "I'm thinking of adopting an incomprehensible accent so people won't ask me questions." Dilbert asks Wally as he returns the empty coffee pot to the warmer, "Um... Are you leaving that coffee pot empty right in front of me?" Wally says to Dilbert, "Meeyerna derna furna algonkin buhjoorna."
Tuesday February 27,
2001
Tags #huge, #management training, #stupid mistake, #class, #school, #learn from it, #education
Transcript
MANAGEMENT TRAINING: Dogbert says to Alice and the rest of the Management Training class, "What would you do if you made a huge, incredibly stupid mistake?" A man sitting next to Alice in the class raises his hand and says, "I would try to learn from it." Dogbert asks, "Did you learn anything from your answer?"
Monday May 21,
2001
Tags #vendor, #drinks, #answer questions, #works, #already wroking, #date, #private, #business, #confused, #misunderstanding
Transcript
Alice sits next to Dilbert and Wally at a conference table. She says, "I'm meeting a vendor for drinks tonight. He says it's the only time he has to answer my questions." Dilbert turns to Alice and says, "If that works, please let us know." Alice replies, "What do you mean 'works'? And who is 'us'?" Wally exclaims, "It's already working!"
Friday June 01,
2001
Tags #no raise, #not enough questions, #meetings, #care about job, #thirst for knowledge, #likes wood
Transcript
Asok the Intern sits across from the Boss. The Boss says, "I can't give you a raise. You don't ask enough questions in meetings." The Boss continues, "Questions show that you care about your job and have a thirst for knowledge." Asok is seen at a staff meeting, hand raised, asking, "Who else likes wood?"
Friday October 19,
2001
Tags #talk about layoffs, #hostile questions, #reading, #newspapaer, #reeking slime
Transcript
Catbert is standing on The Boss' desk. Catbert says, "We need to have an all- company meeting to talk about the layoffs." Catbert continues, "You might get some hostile questions owing to the fact that they found out about the layoffs by reading the newspaper." The Boss stands at a podium. He says, "No, I've never noticed that I leave a trail of reeking slime wherever I slither."
Monday March 04,
2002
Tags #staff meetings, #late for meetings, #ten minutes, #stupid stuff, #fine work, #noticing
Transcript
The Boss addresses a meeting, "Can anyone tell me why everyone is always late for my staff meetings?" Alice responds, "Because the first ten minutes are always stupid stuff like 'What are people late?'" Dilbert turns to Alice and says, "Alice, that was some of your finest work." Alice responds, "Thank you for noticing."
Monday April 22,
2002
Tags #training budget slashed, #cancel class, #already paid, #appear smart, #while secretly stupid
Transcript
The Boss says to Dilbert, "The training budget got slashed. You have to cancel your class." Dilbert responds, "We already paid for the class." The Boss replies, "We'll look bad if you go." Dilbert says, "So, our plan is to appear smart while secretly being stupid?" The Boss replies, "You can make anything sound bad."
Wednesday October 23,
2002
Tags #investment baker, #hired wesel, #media questions, #stock holders, #good for stcokholders, #parking lot
Transcript
Headline: Dogbert the Investment Banker. Dogbert introduces a weasel to The Boss, "I hired a weasel to teach you how to answer media questions." The weasel says, "No matter what the reporters ask, always give the same answer 'It will be good for stockholders.'" The Boss is answering media questions. A reporter asks, "Is it true that you ran over a stockholder in the parking lot?" The Boss responds, "It'll be good for him."
Friday March 07,
2003
Tags #loser magazine, #pen, #easy questions, #borrow pen, #chewer, #denied loan
Transcript
The reporter approaches Wally and says, "Wally, I'd like to interview you for 'Loser Magazine.'" Wally responds, "Okay." The reporter asks, "Do you have a pen?" Wally says, "Wow. These are easy questions." The reporter says, "I mean, may I borrow your pen?" Wally responds, "No, you look like a chewer."
Saturday March 29,
2003
Tags #pecking order, #fool, #stupid, #Dilbert, #coffee cup
Transcript
The Boss stands in front of his manager's desk. The manager yells, "You fool! How could you be so stupid!" The Boss approaches Dilbert and yells, "You fool! How could you be so stupid!" Dilbert picks up his coffee mug and yells, "You stupid coffee mug!!"