Away From Scoiety Comic Strips - Page 9
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475 Results for Away From Scoiety
View 81 - 90 results for away from scoiety comic strips. Discover the best "Away From Scoiety" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday January 25,
1992
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #kitty kelly, #biography, #watch, #love, #Women, #relationships
Transcript
Dilbert's clothes are disheveled and he has lipstick marks all over his head. Dogbert asks, "What happened to you?" Dilbert replies, "Kitty Kelly was here to write your biography. She was all over me. I think she took my watch." Dogbert says, "I never trust anybody named 'Kitty.'" Dilbert says as he walks away, "I think I love her."
Sunday February 02,
1992
Tags #Dilbert, #suggestions, #report, #ridiculous, #spit, #woman, #carol, #assistant, #violent
Transcript
Dilbert tells a woman, "Carol, If you have any suggestions on my report, let me know." Carol looks at the document and asks, "What kind of ridiculous tripe are you pushing??" Carol says, "I spit on your report!" Carol lights a match and says, "I should burn it to ashes, but I won't . . ." Carol cries, "Because I'd rather dance on your grave after people read this!" She laughs. Carol throws the document at Dilbert and says, "Crawl back into your hole, you fly-infested bucket of dead carp!!" Dilbert walks away as Carol shouts, "Die! Die! Die!" Dilbert tells Wally, "Next time I'm just gonna say 'Carol, make some copies.'" Wally says, "The secretaries here have way too much power."
Tuesday February 04,
1992
Tags #Dilbert, #mensa, #meeting, #geniuses
Transcript
A man with a large head answers the door wearing a bathrobe and says, "Uh . . . Hi, Dilbert?" Dilbert says, "Hi. I'm here for my first Mensa meeting of geniuses." The man says, "It's at 5 P.M., not 5 A.M." Dilbert walks away thinking, "Bad start."
Saturday February 22,
1992
Tags #Dilbert, #brett, #hydrogen bomb, #kill, #people, #cool, #suggestion
Transcript
Dogbert and Brett walk toward each other on the sidewalk. Dogbert says to the little boy, "Hi, Brett. What do you have there?" Brett, who is pulling a wagon with a bomb on it, replies, "Hydrogen bomb!!" Dogbert says, "Be careful. You could kill people with that thing." Brett says, "Really? Cool!" Brett pushes the bomb and says, "That's a great suggestion!" Dogbert walks away saying, "I've done better . . ."
Wednesday February 26,
1992
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #nation's, #founding fathers, #motives, #running, #president, #slave owners, #democratic, #ignorance
Transcript
Dilbert and Dogbert sit at the table. Dilbert says, "I think the nation's founding fathers would be ashamed of your motives for running for President." Dogbert asks, "Weren't they slave owners?" Dilbert replies, "Well . . . Sure, but at least it was democratic." Dogbert says, "Back then, the only people allowed to vote were white male land owners." Dogbert continues as Dilbert walks away, "In fact, the presidency was created so the ignorant masses would think there was a king." Dilbert covers his ears and says, "La la la la la la la la."
Saturday March 14,
1992
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #petimony, #fuzzy, #cat, #pet, #disgust, #rubbed, #leg, #pine-scented, #sand
Transcript
Dilbert says, "The defense calls Fuzzy the Cat." Fuzzy sits in the witness stand. Dilbert asks Fuzzy, "Isn't it true that I did not in fact PET you, but only pushed you away in mild disgust when you rubbed my leg?" Fuzzy replies, "I have this sudden urge to bury you in pine-scented sand."
Thursday March 19,
1992
Tags #Dogbert, #insecure, #insult, #thin, #sexy, #whale, #bad, #hairdo
Transcript
Dogbert walks outdoors thinking, "It's easy to make insecure people insult themselves." Dogbert says to a woman, "Good morning, ma'am. You look thin and sexy today!" The woman replies, "Sexy?! Ha! I'm a whale . . . A whale with a bad hairdo!" Dogbert walks away humming and thinking, "Next."
Saturday March 21,
1992
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #smart, #pills, #chinese, #herbs, #news, #story, #naturally, #discovered, #gift, #item
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his desk. Dogbert enters holding a paper bag and says, "I bought some 'Smart Pills' for you. They're made from Chinese herbs." Dogbert continues, "I saw a news story about these . . . And naturally I thought of you." Dogbert says as he walks away, "I've discovered the perfect gift item."
Tuesday March 31,
1992
Tags #bob, #dinosaur, #Dogbert, #economic, #advisor, #president, #money, #stimulating, #economy, #fritter, #health
Transcript
Bob the Dinosaur and Dogbert sit at the table. Bob asks, "You're going to be an economic advisor to the President? What do you know about economics?" Dogbert replies, "It's simple, Bob." Dogbert explains, "The country needs to give all the money to dogs, thus stimulating the economy." Bob asks, "Why can't we spend the money ourselves?" Dogbert replies, "You'd probably fritter it away on food and health care."
Friday April 03,
1992
Tags #Dilbert, #bug, #computer, #program, #long, #date, #Women, #relationships
Transcript
Dilbert and a woman sit at a table in a restaurant. Dilbert says, ". . . So, then I thought, ha! Maybe there's a bug in the computer program itself!" The woman reaches into her purse. The woman sprays Dilbert with a can of mace and he screams. Dilbert says, "Maybe that story went on a little long . . ." The woman asks, "What gave it away?"