Blame Comic Strips - Page 9
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118 Results for Blame
View 81 - 90 results for blame comic strips. Discover the best "Blame" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday November 04,
2014
Tags blame, ceos, cnbc, executives, home address, layoffs, new prodcuts, product, quarterly, zero
Transcript
CEO: Our sales for the quarter are zero. Because I might have mentioned on CNBC that we have a better, cheaper model coming soon. So... great job on the new product... and I need to fire half of you so it looks as if I do things. Voice: What is your home address?
Top Dilbert Searches
marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Wednesday January 28,
2015
Success Is About Who You Know
Tags blame, blaming, success, who you know
Transcript
Wally: Success is all about who you know. I'm not successful, so apparently it doesn't help to know you. Dilbert: I"m sorry I let you down. Wally: It's as if you aren't even trying.
Friday January 08,
2016
Wearing Gloves To Handle Spreadsheet
Tuesday April 05,
2016
Ted Never Got The File
Tags blame, communication, responsibility, technology, guest artist, brenna thummler
Transcript
Ted: I never got the file you said you would send. Dilbert: I don't know what file type you want. Ted: Why didn't you ask? Dilbert: Why didn't you check your email and see that I did? Ted: Why didn't you text me to say you emailed me? Dilbert: Why don't you drive into a ravine?
Monday April 25,
2016
All Options Lead To Doom
Tags failure, blame, responsibility, scapegoat
Transcript
Dilbert: All of our options lead to doom. The only thing we can control is who we blame. Boss: That sounds about right. Except for the "we" part.
Saturday May 21,
2016
Managing Your Boss
Tags management, accountability, blame, time, time management
Transcript
Boss: Your project is three weeks behind schedule. Dilbert: That's the exact amount of time I was waiting for you to answer my questions. Boss: You need to manage me better. Dilbert: Okay, you're fired.
Wednesday August 17,
2016
A System For Transferring Mistakes
Tags blame, mistake, boss, review, human resources, revenge, business
Transcript
Boss: Make sure we get all of the cost savings that our vendor promised with our new software. Dilbert: Those savings are not real. The vendor lied to you because you know nothing about technology. Boss: If only I had some way to turn my mistake into his mistake. Catbert: It's called a performance review.
Sunday September 04,
2016
Transcript
Wally: Are these user specifications complete? I ask because any later changes will cause me to miss the deadline. Man: What if I only need a tiny change later? Wally: I'm counting on it. That way I can blame you when I miss the deadline. Man: How do most people handle this situation? Wally: Well, the pessimists know they're doomed, so it's no surprise to them when it happens. Man: What do the optimists do? Wally: They become pessimists.
Monday October 10,
2016
Gawful Media Company
Tags merger, acquisition, gawker, morals, executives, decision, information
Transcript
CEO: The board is proud to announce that we will be acquiring the Gawful Media Company. Dilbert: Are you aware that Gawful is so despicable that a crime bill has their name on it? CEO: Hey, don't blame me. I told the board that someone should Google them.
Saturday October 15,
2016
Blame Rolls Downhill
Tags blame, responsibility, management
Transcript
Boss: Our CEO blamed the Sales department for our low revenue. Sales blamed Marketing and Marketing blamed Engineering. Guess why I'm here. Dilbert: To shield me from unfair accusations?

