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268 Results for Buy Audio Lessons

View 81 - 90 results for buy audio lessons comic strips. Discover the best "Buy Audio Lessons" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 28, 1998's comic on:


Tags #sales man, #vendor, #offcie, #fake personality, #buy stuff, #blue things, #so dumb

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Dilbert sits at a conference table with a salesperson. Dilbert says, "...And we'll buy a dozen of these. We're trying to spend our budget so it doesn't get cut next year." The salesperson says, "This is great! You guys are so dumb that I don't even have to use my fake personality to make the sale!" Dilbert says, "...And nine of these blue things." Salesperson turns away and pulls his pants down. The salesperson says, "There's a full moon on the horizon!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 05, 1998's comic on:


Tags #misses staff meeting, #buy donuts, #freedom donuts

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The Boss, Wally, Dilbert and Alice sit at the conference table. The Boss says, "From now on, anyone who misses a staff meeting must buy donuts for the next meeting." Wally, Dilbert and Alice look at each other. The Boss sits at a now empty conference table. The boss thinks, "Did I just sell them their freedom for donuts?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 12, 1998's comic on:


Tags #elbonia, #class in cobol, #learn on plane, #scuba lessons

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Dilbert sits at his computer. The Boss stands in the doorway of his cubicle. The boss says, "I'm sending you to Elbonia to teach a class in cobol." Dilbert says, "I don't know cobol." The boss says, "Maybe you can learn it on the plane." Dilbert glares at the Boss over the wall of his cubicle. The Boss walks away. Dilbert says, "Maybe I'll take some scuba lessons up there too." The Boss thinks, "I'm making my getaway."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 16, 1999's comic on:


Tags #internet start up, #dominant internet source, #tuna snadwhiches

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Dilbert stands in Wally's cubicle. Wally is at his computer. Dilbert says, "How's your internet start-up company coming?" Wally says, still sporting a pontail,"Good." Wally says, "My plan is to be the dominant internet source for tuna sandwiches." Dilbert says, "So if I buy one, you ship it overnight?" Wally says, "no, you have to come and pick it up."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 28, 1999's comic on:


Tags #raises, #young employees, #few dollars, #buy small motorcyel, #crack cocaine, #be your mentor, #tickle my own fett, #perfect sat

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The boss sits across from Asok. The boss says, "Asok, I can't give raises to young employees." The boss says, "Because as soon as you get a few dollars in your pocket..." The boss says, "You buy small motorcycles a disappear in the night." The boss says, "I know that's a generalization." The boss says, "Some of you prefer the crack cocaine." Asok is mad. The boss says, "The good new is that I'm willing to be your mentor." Asok gets up and screams. Asok says, "Aaagh! I got double eight hundreds on my SAT!!! For what?!!" The boss walks Asok out. The boss says, "Sometimes when I'm in a bad mood I tickle my own feet."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 13, 1999's comic on:


Tags #all the copies, #bestseller, #house as colleral, #dump, #pay back, #dogbert gets loan

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Caption: "Dogbert gets a loan" Dogbert sits across the desk from a bank executive. Dogbert wags his tail and says, "I plan to buy all the copies of hte book I authored, thus making it a bestseller." Dogbert says, "And I'd like to use your house as collateral. Unless it's a dump." The banker says, "How are you planning to pay us back?" dogbert says, "Do you take books?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 16, 1999's comic on:


Tags #buy island nation, #sell a kit, #conquermoppress, #indigent people, #buy rhode island, #evil tyrant

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Dogbert and Dilbert sit at a table. Dogbert reads a magazine entiteled "Islands", dilbert drinks coffee. Dogbert wags his tail and says, "did you know you can but your own island nation?" Dogbert says, "They even sell a kit that helps you conquer and oppress the indigent people!" Dogbert wags his tail and says on the phone, "I'd liike to buy Rhode Island... and one "evil tyrant" conquest kit." Person on the phone says, "Would you like a flag with that?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 30, 1999's comic on:


Tags #internet business idea, #sent idea, #five companies, #space

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The Boss says, off-frame, to Dilbert, "I like your internet business idea. Let's do it." Dilbert, off-frame says to The Boss, "I sent you that idea a year ago. Since then, five companies have gone IPO in that space." The Boss says, "Can we buy one of them?" Dilbert says, "If by 'one' you mean one share of stock, yes."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 18, 1999's comic on:


Tags #company, #pdas for employees, #business trips, #palm pilot california, #cheap, #business

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Alice, Dilbert, Wally and the boss are in a meeting. The boss says, "The company will not buy PDA's for employees." Dilbert raises his hand and says, "Question: Will you still pay for business trips of no discernible value?" The boss replies, "Of course." The boss is thinking, "A lot of people are traveling to Palm Pilot California lately."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 06, 1999's comic on:


Tags #speak english, #think in french, #french lessons, #croissant

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Carol is standing next to the boss's desk holding a folder. The boss is sitting at his desk while signing a sheet of paper says: "I speak English but I think in French." The boss hands a sheet of paper to Carol and says: "Someday I'll take French lessons to find out what the heck I'm thinking." Carol exits the boss's office and the boss thinks: "Croissant"