Cheap Elbonian Labor Comic Strips - Page 9

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238 Results for Cheap Elbonian Labor

View 81 - 90 results for cheap elbonian labor comic strips. Discover the best "Cheap Elbonian Labor" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 02, 2001's comic on:


Tags #mouse cramp, #elbonian prison wall, #chained upside down, #winning converstaion, #topper, #annoying, #one better

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Dilbert, Topper and Wally are sitting at a table. Dilbert, wiggling his fingers, says, "I'm getting a mouse cramp." Topper says to Dilbert and Wally, "I spent seven years chained upside down to an Elbonian prison wall." Topper says to Dilbert and Wally, "At the risk of sounding too competitive, I believe I'm winning this conversation."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 07, 2001's comic on:


Tags #battery technology, #question motives, #transformation, #lying, #avoid work, #manual labor

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Dilbert says to a female co-worker, "No known battery technology can handle this load and be this size." The female co-worker folds her arms as Dilbert says, "That's not what you wanted to hear." The female co-worker grimaces as Dilbert says, "So your mind will erase what I said..." Dilbert continues, "... And replace the memory with something totally ridiculous so you can question my motives." The female co-worker grunts, "Gaah!" Dilbert thinks, "The transformation is complete." The female co-worker exclaims, "How can you say there's no such thing as a battery?!" The female co-worker berates Dilbert, "You're lying to avoid work! I'm going to talk to your boss!" Dilbert says to Dogbert, "Lately, the only thing keeping me from being a serial killer is my distaste for manual labor." Dogbert says, "You're preaching to the choir."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 31, 2001's comic on:


Tags #outsourced sales, #elbonian company, #complex technology, #bad string, #call back, #mud pile

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The Boss says to Wally and Dilbert, "We outsourced our sales and fulfillment functions to an Elbonian company." Wally looks at Dilbert as Dilbert asks, "Um... Are you sure that's the best way to sell complex technology?" Three Elbonians and a pig each are holding a tin can with string to their ears. One Elbonian says, "Could you call back? We have a bad string."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 01, 2001's comic on:


Tags #elboninan fullfillment, #service, #thwart, #300 times, #string phones, #mud pile, #pig, #laughing, #animals

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Two Elbonians each have a tin can with string held up to their ears. One Elbonian says, "This is the Elbonian Fulfillment Service. How may I thwart you?" The Elbonians continue listening to their tin cans. One Elbonian hears, "Grunt grunt grunt grunt grunt." The Elbonian holds his tin can away from his ear and says to the pig, "Okay, it wasn't funny the first 300 times either."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 03, 2001's comic on:


Tags #sales department, #die, #deaths, #bile, #quality control

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Man: Hello, is this the sales department? Elbonian 1: May you die a thousand deaths by choking on your own bile. Supervisor may be monitoring this call for quality control, Elbonian 2: Its good.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 09, 2001's comic on:


Tags #discovered oil, #wild life perserve, #elbonian, #endangered species, #no impact, #drilled unicorn, #dead, #animals, #drill fields

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The Boss: we've discovered oil in the Elbonian wild life preserve. DOnt worry about the endangered species. Our drilling will have no impact. ELbonian: oops

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 10, 2001's comic on:


Tags #animals dna, #clone one, #dont finish, #eating burgers, #elbonian unicorn, #save unicorn dna

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An Elbonian is holding a tin can tied to a string to his ear. The Elbonia says, "I'm sad to report that our drilling has caused the extinction of the Elbonian unicorn." The boss, at his desk, is on the phone. The boss says, "Save a sample of the animal's DNA so we can clone a new one." The Elbonian with the tin can turns to another Elbonian, who is eating a burger. The first Elbonian says, "Don't finish that."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 11, 2001's comic on:


Tags #oil wells, #albanian wild life preserve, #extinction, #seven species, #useless, #species, #eat and grunt

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The boss is giving a presentation as he points to a slide of a dead animal. The boss says, "Our oil wells in the Elbonian Wildlife Preserve have caused the extinction of seven species." The boss continues, "Luckily, they were useless species who did nothing but eat and grunt." Wally is sitting beside Dilbert, eating a doughnut and grunting, "Mm..mm..mm.."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 13, 2001's comic on:


Tags #tight labor market, #complicated tasks, #harder jobs, #dumb employees

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Dilbert is pointing to a graphic of a person being squeezed in a vise. Dilbert says, "Due to a tight labor market and increasingly complicated tasks.." Dilbert continues, "Harder and harder jobs will be staffed with dumber and dumber employees until the logical limit:" As a table to zombie like employees stare, Dilbert says, "This meeting."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 01, 2001's comic on:


Tags #approval, #computer purchse, #capital budget, #ceo, #apparoval, #asks for things, #assemble computer, #cubicles, #cheap boss, #need approval

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Dilbert approaches the Boss' desk with a piece of paper. Dilbert says, "I need your approval for to buy a new computer." The Boss says, "Eh! Eh!" as Dilbert speaks. The Boss replies, "There's a freeze on the capital budget. Only our CEO can approve it." Dilbert holds out the slip of paper again and says, "Could you ask him to..." as The Boss says, "Eh! Eh!" The Boss replies, "I don't want to be the guy who always asks for things." The Boss continues, "Maybe you could assemble a computer from components that are each within my approval limit?" Dilbert asks, "What's your approval limit?" The Boss replies, "Ten dollars." Dilbert says, "If you need me, I'll be in my cubicle banging my head against the wall." The Boss stands overlooking the cubicles from his office door as sounds of "Thud! Thud! Thud! come from a cubicle. The Boss thinks to himself, "This is why I keep them in soft-walled containers."