Crazy Making Comic Strips - Page 9

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318 Results for Crazy Making

View 81 - 90 results for crazy making comic strips. Discover the best "Crazy Making" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 12, 1998's comic on:


Tags #elbonia, #class in cobol, #learn on plane, #scuba lessons

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Dilbert sits at his computer. The Boss stands in the doorway of his cubicle. The boss says, "I'm sending you to Elbonia to teach a class in cobol." Dilbert says, "I don't know cobol." The boss says, "Maybe you can learn it on the plane." Dilbert glares at the Boss over the wall of his cubicle. The Boss walks away. Dilbert says, "Maybe I'll take some scuba lessons up there too." The Boss thinks, "I'm making my getaway."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 21, 1998's comic on:


Tags #supermodel, #trouble finding dates, #men are intimidated, #beauty, #computer skills, #system adminstartor, #health

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Dilbert and Dogbert sit at Dilbert's computer at home. Dilbert says, "I'm chatting with a supermodel who has trouble finding dates." Dilbert says, "She says that men are intimidated by her beauty and her computer skills." Dilbert says, "Dang! The system administrator is making a move on her." Dogbert ears fly up. Dogbert says, "Type Faster!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 06, 1999's comic on:


Tags #budget forecast, #hard job, #hate tiny guts, #tiny guts

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The boss says to Asok, "Asok, I've chosen you to put our budget forecast together." The boss says, "It's a hard job but you'll get the satisfaction of making everyone hate your tiny guts." Asok walks away and thinks, "My guts are not tiny."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 08, 1999's comic on:


Tags #budget calculated, #double check numbers, #mentally adjust, #huge mistake, #upside down nine

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The boss stands behind Asok who is at his computer. The boss says, "Do you have the udget calculated yet, Asok?" Asok says, "I need to double-check the numbers." The boss says, "Give me a copy now. I'll mentally adjust for the possibilty the numbers are wrong." Asok says, "Am I making a huge mistake?" The boss says, "This six is probaly an upside-down nine."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 21, 1999's comic on:


Tags #dogbert consults, #eliminate phone support, #via internet, #discourage people, #ominous list, #personal questions

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Caption: "Dogbert Consults" Sogbert stands on the boss's desk. DOgbert says, "Eliminate phone support for your product. Provide help only via the internet." Dogbert's tail wags and he says, "Then discourage people by making them answer an ominous list of personal questions." Man looks terrified in front of his computer the computer screen reads, "1. What is your home address? 2. When do you shower?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 14, 1999's comic on:


Tags #enable intergration, #okay to do nothing?, #redesign processes, #resources and tools, #wally and boss

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The boss meets with Wally and Dilbert at a conference table. The boss says, "We'll redesign our processes to enable enterprise intergration of knowledge resources and tools." Wally raises his hand and says, "Question: Is it okay if I do nothing?" The boss says, "No." Wally says, "Well, excuse me for making a suggestion."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 13, 1999's comic on:


Tags #all the copies, #bestseller, #house as colleral, #dump, #pay back, #dogbert gets loan

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Caption: "Dogbert gets a loan" Dogbert sits across the desk from a bank executive. Dogbert wags his tail and says, "I plan to buy all the copies of hte book I authored, thus making it a bestseller." Dogbert says, "And I'd like to use your house as collateral. Unless it's a dump." The banker says, "How are you planning to pay us back?" dogbert says, "Do you take books?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 24, 1999's comic on:


Tags #wavy pattern, #carpet, #dizzy, #home, #sleep, #groggy, #health

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Wally stands in front of the boss' desk and says, "The wavy pattern on the carpet is making me dizzy." Wally says, "I'd better go home and sleep it off." Wally says, "I'll be back tomorrow unless all the sleep makes me groggy."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 25, 1999's comic on:


Tags #evil director, #Catbert, #sick days, #unusual reasons, #imagined to be fly, #hair, #crazy reasons, #made up reason, #fake excuses

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CAption: "CAtbert: Evil H.R. Director" CAtbert says, "Wally, you've taken sick days for unusual reasons." Catbert looks at a piece of paper and says, "For example, one day you got sick because you "...accidently imagined what ir would be like if you were a fly." Catbert says, "And today it's your hair?" Wally says, "I lathered and rinsed but I don't remember repeating."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 01, 1999's comic on:


Tags #call center, #customer questions, #working conditions, #inhumane, #innocent employees

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The Boss: Your project is to build a call center to handle customer questions. Keep the costs downy making the working conditions inhumane. Dilbert: My conscience won't allow me to harm innocent employees. The Boss: we won't be paying enough ti hire any innocent employees.