Knowledge Comic Strips - Page 9

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128 Results for Knowledge

View 81 - 90 results for knowledge comic strips. Discover the best "Knowledge" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags anger, honesty, fester, hatred, pale doughy body, tree of knowledge, falls on head, die ironically

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Boss: Carol, if you have any issues, just be honest. Don't let anything fester. Carol: I hate every subatomic particle in your pale, doughy body. I hope the tree of knowledge falls on your head so you die ironically. Boss: I need to rethink my no-festering rule. Carol: Tree of knowledge... get it?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags ignorance (knowledge), managers & supervisors, employees, hatered, run over, clown, ugly truth, demise, bad wishes, business

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The Ugly Truth Visits Man: Your employees hate your carb-fattened guts. They hope you get run over by a clown car because it will make your demise extra funny. Boss: I hear mumbling but no on is there! Man: It's weird for me too.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags above average, ignorance (knowledge), managers & supervisors, top 110%, study of managers, percentages, business

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Boss: A study says that 74% of managers think they are above average. That means that 36% of managers aren't aware that they are above average too. Dilbert: The way I look at it, you're all in the top 110%. Boss: Exactly. Thank you.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags fear, inventions, machine learning, track customers, machines take over, annihilate all humans

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CEO: Our machine learning technology allows us to track customer preferences and use that knowledge to manipulate them. Dilbert: That seems like the step that happens right before the machines take over the earth and annihilate all humans. CEO: There's always one person in every crowd who says that. Dilbert: Not for much longer, apparently.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags boss, coffee, good managing, horing, ignorance (knowledge), insulting, managers & supervisors, smart people, confontation, business

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Boss: Today I learned that the secret of good managing is hiring people who are smarter than I am. Maybe I'll try that next time.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags ignorance (knowledge), managers & supervisors, values, don't run with scissors, ask for raises, employee values, business

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CEO: Experts say we need to empower employees with "values." So I guess we need some values, whatever the heck those are. Boss: I think it's like "Don't run with scissors." CEO: Let's start with that and see if they stop asking for raises.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags ignorance (knowledge), joking, new software, interrupt you, carpal tunnel, replace humans

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Boss: The new software will interrupt you every five minutes so you don't get carpal tunnel. Dilbert: Aren't you worried the software will replace you? hee-hee! Boss: I don't get that. Dilbert: That's why it's funny.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags ignorance (knowledge), managers & supervisors, appleby ceo, admit wrongs, other people, humbly admit, business

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CEO: The CEO of Apple says a leader should admit when he's wrong. That won't work for me because I'm never wrong. The best I can do is admit when other people are wrong. Boss: That sort of misses the point. CEO: Well, I humbly admit you're wrong.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags complaining, ignorance (knowledge), product features, hodge podge, complexity, teamwork

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Dilbert: I added all of the product features that each of you demanded. Now our product is a worthless hodgepodge of complexity. I appreciate your input. I couldn't have failed without you. Boss: Teamwork!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags ignorance (knowledge), joking, experts, best leaders, good sense of humour, awesome leader, hilarous, laugh

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Boss: Experts say the best leaders have a good sense of humor. I'm an awesome leader, therefore I must be hilarious. Wally: I can't tell if I should laugh at that. Boss: That's because you're not a leader.