Network Remotely Comic Strips - Page 9

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

122 Results for Network Remotely

View 81 - 90 results for network remotely comic strips. Discover the best "Network Remotely" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #conversation, #upgrade, #unstable network, #risks, #folksy response, #break eggs

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: The upgrade could make our network unstable. Boss: You can't make an omelet without breaking some eggs. Dilbert: I interpret your folksy response to mean I should upgrade the network despite the risks. Boss: No, I'm saying I'll break your eggs if the network goes down.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boss, #inventions, #joking, #remote control, #shocked, #stick collar, #wearable computing, #necklace computer

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: Wearable computing is the next big thing. This is my prototype of a necklace computer. Prepare to be shocked. Dilbert: Did you just talk him into wearing a remotely controlled shock collar? Wally: People think I have no goals. click.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #friendship, #managers & supervisors, #netwrok, #career, #weird and creepy, #send email, #best friend, #relationships, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: Would you mind if I network with you to help my career? Boss: I would have said yes, but you made it feel all weird and creepy. Perhaps you could send me email that I won't read. Asok: That makes you my best friend!

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #thinking, #technology problem, #executive attention netowrk, #social awareness, #radical change, #sarcasm

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I have to warn you that I'll be going deep on a technology problem today. I'll be using the executive attention network of my brain at the expense of my social awareness. Boss: Sounds like a radical change. Dilbert: I can't tell if that was sarcasm.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #engineers, #thinking, #mental energy, #executive attention, #brain network, #dangerous territory, #surpasses last remnets, #sociala awreness, #misread social cues

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: He transferred all of his mental energy to the executive attention network of his brain to solve a problem. This is dangerous territory for an engineer because it suppresses the last remnants of his social awareness. Expect him to misread social cues. Dilbert: They're here to kill me.

Elbonians Hacked Their Network

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Elbonians Hacked Their Network - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #developing countries, #hacker, #hackers, #hacking, #internet, #retaliation, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: We think Elbonians hacked into our network. Dilbert: That's unlikely. CEO: We must respond proportionately by hacking their entire Internet. Dilbert: It's not much of an Internet. CEO: What do you need to cripple it. Dilbert: A plane ticket and scissors.

Dilbert Sent To Disable Elbonian Internet

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert Sent To Disable Elbonian Internet - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #annoyance, #binary, #code, #coding, #developing countries, #frustration, #internet, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I have been sent to disable the Elbonian Internet as retaliation for hacking into our corporate network. Elbonian 1: Only our elites use the Internet. The rest of us don't care. Knock yourself out. Elbonian 2: Zero, zero, one, zero, one... Elbonian 3: I wish someone would just disable this thing.

Mansplaining The Network

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Mansplaining The Network - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #mansplainer, #mansplaining, #relations between the sexes, #sexism, #frustration

View Transcript

Transcript

Mansplaining. Man: Let me explain how our network is designed. Alice: I personally designed our network and I know far more about it than you ever will. Man: Do you know what a cloud is? Alice: It's where you'll be playing your harp in a minute.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #flirting, #romance, #privacy, #stalking, #creepy, #creeper, #gestures, #gifts, #coworkers

View Transcript

Transcript

The New Employee. Dilbert: Hi, I'm Dilbert. I bought you a book. Woman: Okay, weird. Who buys gifts for new co-workers? And how did you know this is my favorite author? Dilbert: I asked one of the network guys to check your browser history. Catbert assured me that employees have no right to privacy. I heard that women like it when men put thought into a gift. I hope you appreciate my romantic gesture. Wally: Did she make a romantic gesture back? Dilbert: I choose to interpret it that way.

Alice Should Network With Men

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Alice Should Network With Men - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #catch-22, #sexism, #Women, #sexist, #attraction, #success, #glass ceiling

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: Alice, the best way to break the glass ceiling is to do more networking with male co-workers. Alice: Can we talk about this over lunch? CEO: Wow. You are so into me.