Ran Six Miles Comic Strips - Page 9
178 Results for Ran Six Miles
View 81 - 90 results for ran six miles comic strips. Discover the best "Ran Six Miles" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share August 11, 2001's comic on:
Asok is sitting at his desk, noticeably still in pain. The Boss says, "The cure for carpal tunnel is to eat six bananas a day." The Boss shakes his hand and continues, "That's what I do and I have the hands of a teenager." Asok turns around and replies, "Do you have any data to support your medical advice?" The Boss responds, "Does a huge pimple count?"
Share September 11, 2001's comic on:
A male coworker says to Dilbert and Wally, "I'm being moved to the magic portal, cubicle 4575OR!" The coworker continues, "Everyone who sits in the magic portal gets a better job within six months!" Wally and Dilbert are walking alone. Wally asks Dilbert, "There isn't a cubicle 4575OR, is there?" Dilbert responds, "The first round of layoffs are always the cruelest."
Share September 14, 2001's comic on:
Dilbert is reading a contract while meeting with a business associate. Dilbert says, "We've negotiated this contract for six weeks and today you double your delivery time?" Dilbert continues, "I can't tell if you're an incredibly devious weasel or simply incompetent." The business associate begins to pull on his own nose and says, "Here's a clue." The business associate pulls of his nose to reveal a weasel's nose underneath. It makes the sound, "poink."
Share October 03, 2001's comic on:
"You've got to implement a six sigma program or else you're doomed." "Aren't you the same consultant who sold us the worthless TQM program a few years ago?" "I assure you that this program has a totally, totally different name." "When can we start?"
Share October 04, 2001's comic on:
Headline: Six Sigma Consultant. Dogbert says to The Boss and Dilbert, "Every company that used my six sigma program increased profits." Dogbert continues, "...Except for the ones that were in industry downturns..." Dogbert continues, "...Or flat growth industries... Or industries that only upturned a little bit."
Share October 05, 2001's comic on:
Headline: Six Sigma Consultant. Dogbert is standing in front of a room. He says, "All of you are selfish and dimwitted but don't worry." Dogbert continues, "I'll teach you a process that will bog you down in meetings so you can't hurt anything." Asok panics and exclaims, "I can't move my arms!" The rest of the class is asleep.
Share October 06, 2001's comic on:
Headline: Six Sigma Consultant. Dogbert says to the meeting, "The first step is to identify your problems." The Boss responds, "We don't have any problems. What's the second step?" Alice pins one hand down with the other and clenches her teeth. She thinks to herself, "Must..control...fist." The Boss says, "I hope someone gives me a belt."
Share October 07, 2001's comic on:
Alice is sitting at her computer. The Boss approaches from behind with a package in his hand and says, "Happy service anniversary, Alice." The Boss continues, "We're out of twenty-year pins so I got twenty of the one- year pins." The Boss hands Alice the package and says, "You can pin these babies all over your blouse... or fishing hat if you prefer." The Boss continues, "The card says, 'To Kathy' but it was never opened. For some reason she quit the day she got her twenty pins." The Boss continues, "Incidentally, I have to charge you $262 for the pins. The company doesn't pay for them." Alice holds the box angrily. Alice responds, "First of all, I've only worked here for about six years.." The Boss interrupts, "Wow, you look older. Anyway, just give me the $262 and throw away eight pins and we'll call it good." Alice rolls up her sleeve and shakes with anger. She holds one arm back with the other. The Boss asks, "Why are you rolling up your sleeve? Are you going to pin them to your arm?
Share October 08, 2001's comic on:
The Boss says to Asok and Dilbert, "Our CEO has voluntarily slashed his pay from six million per year to four." The Boss continues, "In a written statement he said he wants to 'share the pain.' The Boss asks, "Do you feel better now?" Asok replies, "I make my own underwear from sandwich bags."
Share November 28, 2001's comic on:
Headline: Dogbert Airlines. Dogbert announces into a microphone, "Attention travelers! Our hub at the South Pole is experiencing permafrost." The customers look alarmed as they listen to the loud speaker. Dogbert's voice continues, "Please form a primitive society and live in the terminal forever." Dogbert continues into the microphone, "The good news is that you'll earn six 'Dogbert Miles' that can be used on the 35th of every month."