Request Secretary Comic Strips - Page 9

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View 81 - 90 results for request secretary comic strips. Discover the best "Request Secretary" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #live person, #attracted to idea, #drain on morale, #voice mail, #secretary in action, #answering phone

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The Boss says to Carol, "Carol, from now on, I want a live person answering my phone." Carol asks the Boss, "What attracted you to that idea?" Carol continues, "Was it the inefficiency or the drain of morale?" The Boss replies, "Important executives don't use voice mail." Dilbert approaches the Boss and says, "I have some information for you." The Boss answers, "Call me." While standing in front of the Boss, Dilbert begins dialing his telephone number. Carol picks up the Boss' line and says, "He's not here. Do you want to leave a detailed message?" Dilbert answers, "Yes." Carol screams in the phone, "Well, you can't!!!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #vp stalks alice, #bouquet, #pencils, #fire secreatry, #vp, #no flowers

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VP Stalks Alice VP: I brought you a bouquet, Alice. Alice: Thats a bunch of pencils, not a flower bouquet. VP: Really? May I use your phone? I need to fire my secretary.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #secretary works harder, #paid less, #many like you, #kill boss eventually, #fewer bosses

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Carol says to the Boss, "I work harder than you. Why do I get paid a fifth of what you make?" The Boss answers, "That's because there are many people like you but few people like me." Carol replies, "Maybe that's because the people like me eventually kill the people like you."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #executive offices, #office too far, #forgetting you name, #move office, #secretary, #forgets boss

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Wally approaches the boss. Wally says, "Your office is too far from the executive offices." The boss says, "It is?" Wally says, "They are actively forgetting your name even as we speak. It's going..going..Gone!" The boss approaches Carol and says, "Carol, we have to move my office!" Carol says, "Have we met?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boring, #director of information, #e-diot, #easy way, #title

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Wally says to The Boss, "You should put an 'E-' in front of your title." Wally says, "It's too boring just being the Director of Information, Operations and Technology." The Boss says to his secretary, Carol, "From now on, call me the E-DIOT." Carol says, "If only there were an easy way to remember that."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #not care, #subordinates, #all changed, #not caring funtion

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The Boss says to Asok the Intern, "I used to not care about my subordinates." The Boss says to Asok, "But that's all changed." The Boss says to Asok as Alice, The Boss' secretary, looks on, "Now I delegate the not-caring function to what's-her-face over here."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #carol, #connections in war zones, #flights, #good rating, #humilation, #parkside strangler, #phone messages, #press conference, #secretary, #vague objectives, #complaining

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Carol sits across from the Boss, who says, "Carol, your overall performance rating is 'good.'" Carol screams, "AAAG! Good is bad! What did I do to deserve this humiliation?" The Boss replies, "Well, you gave me six hundred phone messages that said, 'It might have been Bob.'" Carol furiously replies, "You can't tell me that none of them were from a Bob." The Boss continues, "You arranged for all of my flights to have connections in war zones." Carol throws up her arms and says, "Excuse me for trying to save the company some money." The Boss says, "You held a press conference to announce that I was the Parkside Strangler." Later, Carol tells Wally, "And he refuses to take any responsibility for giving me vague objectives."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boss friend, #hot in here, #huge cutomer, #sales people, #secretary, #childhood friend

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The Boss approaches Carol's desk and tells her, "Carol, screen all my calls and don't let any salespeople through." Carol answers the phone and a voice says, "Hello, I'm a huge customer or perhaps a childhood friend of your boss." Carol replies, "Give me some flirting and you're in." The voice says, "Is it hot in here or is it just you."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #incredulous ed, #budget numbers, #request, #coworker, #budget manager, #hard time, #over reacts, #ed, #new hire

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Caption reads: "Incredulous Ed." Alice approaches Ed and asks, "Ed, do you have the latest budget numbers?" Ed looks up at Alice, squinting his eyes and gesturing, "Budget??? What is a 'budget' and why on earth would I have one?" Alice replies, "Because you're the budget manager." Ed hands her a piece of paper and says, "Here you go."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #travel request, #apporved, #otherwise, #being useless, #olympic sport

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Dilbert approaches the Boss. He asks, "Did you look at my travel request?" The Boss replies, "Not yet." The Boss continues, "Assume it's approved unless I tell you otherwise." Dilbert replies, "It's too bad that being useless isn't an Olympic sport."