Vendor Issues Comic Strips - Page 9

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

176 Results for Vendor Issues

View 81 - 90 results for vendor issues comic strips. Discover the best "Vendor Issues" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

Patty the Amplifier and Distorter "We got a proposal from a new vendor today." "DILBERT LOVES THE NEW VENDOR HE THINKS THAT ANYONE WHO DISAGREES IS AN IDIOT!" "That's not what..." "HE'S HAVING AN AFFAIR WITH THE SALES REP!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

Satan's Vendor "You'll have many benefits after our technology is irrevocably implemented in your network." "For example, when one of our products stops working, we'll blame another vendor within 24 hours." "Do you have free t-shirts?" "Yes. They're made of the finest allergens."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

Satan's Vendor "We'll send your engineers to our free training course." "The training is held on our own island retreat." "I'm going where?" "Fecalruba."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

Satan's Vendor "Ha ha ha! Now that you've implemented our product, you are at our mercy." "We shall raise the price of upgrades and delay promised patches. There is nothing you can do about it. Nothing!" "Wow. You're fast with those scissors." "I scrap."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

"Wally, I've documented all of your disciplinary issues in your personnel file." "You have violations for every letter of the alphabet except Z. For some reason you missed that one." Zzzzzz

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

"There's one thing you should know..." "Whoa, whoa, Asok!" "What?" "Never tell him anything when he's distracted." "He won't remember what you say. Later he'll blame you for not telling him." "Also avoid telling him anything when he's angry, late, or busy." "And don't tell him anything when he's tense or hungry." "That doesn't leave much." "I usually wait for a yawn." Yawn! "My project is behind schedule because the vendor lied!!!" "The next one is all yours."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

"You exceeded all of your goals this year." "But I can't give you much of a raise because you didn't have the appearance of success." "Um...what?" "I have to justify to management all large raises, and they don't know that you exist." "Who do they think accomplished all of my goals?" "I'll make it up to you next year." push "Who was that?" "Some vendor."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

I worked on my own time to invent a room-temperature superconductor that could eliminate our need for oil. "You were supposed to be finding a new vendor for toner cartridges. What happened to that?" "Must...not use...telekinesis..." "Why does my necktie seem so...ERK!!!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

I'll ask the vendor for ballpark prices to see if the idea is feasible. "You can't talk with vendors until our change control board approves the project." "But that would require a cost-benefit analysis." "And I can't do that without ballpark prices from the vendor." "Just take your best guess." "So...I should make up a number so I can get approval to make a phone call and ask what the number should have been?" "Right. But first you need to get my approval to do the cost-benefit analysis." "Will you approve it?" "I'd have to see the numbers."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #diet, #eating disorder, #first 20 pounds, #diet with buddy, #lose weight, #weight issues, #health

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: My doctor says it will be easier if I diet with a buddy. Do you want in on this? Tina: Good lord. I think I just developed an eating disorder! The Boss: They say the first 20 pounds are the easiest. Tina: NOT HELPING!"