Village Meetings Comic Strips - Page 9

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

212 Results for Village Meetings

View 81 - 90 results for village meetings comic strips. Discover the best "Village Meetings" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 21, 2006's comic on:


View Transcript

Transcript

"The first item of business is..." clickety clickety clickety clickety clickety clickety "What's that sound?" clickety clickety clickety clickety "Airplane." "Scooter." "Locusts." "Why does it stop when you talk?" "It landed." "It parked." "They're napping." "Okay...Anyway, I wanted to thank you all for your attendance." clickety clickety clickety clickety "I know you were concerned that my meetings were using up all of the time you had for doing work." clickety clickety clickety clickety clickety "Productivity is up, but apparently we have locusts."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 21, 2006's comic on:


View Transcript

Transcript

Today I had a choice of doing something important that no one would ever realize... "...Or doing something useless that would look like an accomplishment." "So I attended meetings until I could no longer appreciate the difference." "Keep up the good work."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 25, 2006's comic on:


View Transcript

Transcript

"I found a way to save a million dollars by spending only $10,000." "The $10,000 would come out of my budget but the savings would go into someone else's budget. It's not feasible." "Our stockholders might disagree." "That's why they aren't invited to meetings."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 09, 2007's comic on:


View Transcript

Transcript

"Wally, you have attended thousands of meetings and never gotten an action item. What is your secret?" "When the action items are handed out, I use a certain facial expression to ward them off." "...And I'll need someone to..."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 12, 2007's comic on:


Tags #ceo, #go fatser, #set tone, #control, #opinions are treason, #name calling, #intimidation, #corporations, #little guy, #meeting, #tone of intimidation, #condescending, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO Visit CEO: "My meetings go faster when I set the tone." "Opinions are treason." "Do you have any opinions, Doofy?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 09, 2007's comic on:


Tags #manage, #spreadsheets, #emails, #luck, #unimportant subordinates, #bad mood, #insulting, #low morale

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss: "Cancel all of my meetings. I'm going to manage by making spreadsheets and sending e-mails." "With any luck, I'll never again need to speak with unimportant subordinates such as yourself." "C23 is in a bad mood today." "@#$%^!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 27, 2007's comic on:


Tags #Advice, #roll my eyes, #sigh deeply, #dismiss, #village idiot

View Transcript

Transcript

"Do you mind if I give you some advice?" Dilbert: "Not at all." "Do you mind if I roll my eyes, sigh deeply, and dismiss your advice as if it came from the village idiot?" "I might mind." Dilbert: "Well then, let me give you some advice..."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 17, 2007's comic on:


Tags #dead horse, #interview, #offcie, #meeting, #chair, #not answering, #few hours, #secretary, #cancel other meetinsg, #take time, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: "You have good experience as a dead horse, but can you take a beating?" "So, you think you can ignore my questions, do you?" "Cancel all of my meetings, this could take a few more hours."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 23, 2007's comic on:


Tags #management retreat, #golfing, #swimming, #drinking, #getting massages, #count printer papaer, #meaningless work assigned, #dead body, #Sports

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: "I'm off to the management retreat." "I won't be reachable because I'll be busy golfing, swimming, drinking, and getting massages." Carol: "And attending meetings?" The Boss: "I don't see how we'll have any time for that." "While I'm gone, I have a few tasks for you to do." "Open all the packages of printer paper and make sure they have the right number of sheets." "Then crawl into the heating ducts and see if you can find what died in there." Carol: "It's my last boss." the Boss: "Spray him with something lemony."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 02, 2008's comic on:


Tags #bleed people, #living and dead, #awkward

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: Wally, in the past month you've blamed your lack of productivity on seven dead people and three who never existed." Wally: I used to blame living coworkers but it made the meetings awkward. The Boss: Whose fault is that? Wally: Here comes the awkward part.