Card With Wrong Name Comic Strips - Page 9

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Card With Wrong Name

View 81 - 90 results for card with wrong name comic strips. Discover the best "Card With Wrong Name" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 26, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #employees, #office, #office workers, #pay raise, #employee of the year

View Transcript

Transcript

the boss: i'm looking for nominations for employee of the year. the boss: does anyone have a suggestion? dilbert: hypothetically, would the winner of this award be likely to get a larger-than-normal pay raise? the boss: i would think so, yes. dilbert: and is it true that our budget for raises is limited? the boss: yes, of course. dilbert: would it not be against my best interests to nominate an employee who is competing with me for scarce resources? the boss: let's just forget i brought it up. dilbert: i nominate myself.

And Then Mark Said

Thank you for voting.
And Then Mark Said - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 25, 2019's comic on:


Tags #anger, #business, #office, #office workers, #relationships

View Transcript

Transcript

tina: ...and then mark said... dilbert: stop talking about mark! dilbert is visually angry. dilbert: all you do is talk about mark! i am so sick of mark. please talk about anything but mark. dilbert is still visually angry. tina: someone told me you'd say that. dilbert: was his name -- MARK? dilbert angry.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 19, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #email, #office workers, #project manager, #office, #liar, #photoshop

View Transcript

Transcript

office worker: why are you telling everyone my project got canceled? dilbert: i never said anything like that. office worker: you're such a liar. i saw your email to ted. dilbert: if i show you that email right now, and it says nothing about your project... will you admit you were wrong and humbly apologize to me? office worker: i don't think i can commit to that. dilbert: well, anyway, here it is, and you can plainly see you were wrong. office worker: this looks photo-shopped. dilbert: i don't see a winning path for me here.

Blinking Tell

Thank you for voting.
Blinking Tell - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 16, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #spying, #elbonian

View Transcript

Transcript

the boss: i didn't believe you were a spy for the elbonian government until you denied it the wrong way. the boss: you were slow to speak, and you blinked. dilbert: that isn't evidence of anything. the boss yelling: you blinked again!

Elbonian Cyber Threat Meeting

Thank you for voting.
Elbonian Cyber Threat Meeting - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 13, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #meeting, #office, #office workers, #elbonian, #cyber threat

View Transcript

Transcript

the boss: what are we doing about the elbonian cyber threat? dilbert: i called a meeting for tomorrow to come up with a plan for dealing with it. the boss: your weak response proves you are an elbonian spy. dilbert: what? to be continued...

Twitch Gets You More Work

Thank you for voting.
Twitch Gets You More Work - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 11, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #communication, #office, #office workers, #project

View Transcript

Transcript

the boss: does anyone have an idea for fixing our communication problem with marketing? dilbert, alice, wally and asok thinking: must...not...speak or else he will assign the project to me. the boss: i saw your eye twitch. the project is all yours. alice: GAAAA!!! visually upset

Chatting With The Ceo

Thank you for voting.
Chatting With The Ceo - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 03, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #sarcasm, #ceo

View Transcript

Transcript

the boss: i saw you chatting with our eco. what was that all about? dilbert: we were talking about what a great job you do. dilbert: you believe that, right? the boss: seems plausible.

Never Ask About The Sigh

Thank you for voting.
Never Ask About The Sigh - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 21, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #relationships, #serial killer

View Transcript

Transcript

carol, asok and dilbert at a conference table. carol: sigh carol: sigh asok: what's wrong? dilbert distressed: gaaaa!!! never ask about the sigh! dilbert: it's a trap to make you listen to a distressing story full of woe. carol: my husband is a hunter and he wants me to learn how to skin and cook his kills. asok: that doesn't sound so bad. dilbert: wait for it. carol: he's a serial killer. dilbert: and there it is.

Wally Plans His Retirement

Thank you for voting.
Wally Plans His Retirement - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 14, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #retirement, #profit

View Transcript

Transcript

wally: the product i'm developing will be unprofitable for the first none years, but revenue will surge in the tenth. the boss: didn't you tell me you plan to retire in nine years? wally: maybe. the boss: you will be happily retired before we find out if profits really do surge in year ten. the boss: that makes everything you say sound suspicious. wally: numbers don't lie. the boss: who came up with the numbers? wally: that's all the time we have for questions.

Keyboard Clicks

Thank you for voting.
Keyboard Clicks - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 11, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #cell phone, #office, #office workers

View Transcript

Transcript

alice: i noticed you have your keyboard click sounds activated. i've been listening to it all morning. the boss holding cell phone: i don't know how to make it stop. alice: i'll show you. frame shows outside of office building with phone being thrown out window.