Carrying Intern Comic Strips - Page 9

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293 Results for Carrying Intern

View 81 - 90 results for carrying intern comic strips. Discover the best "Carrying Intern" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 21, 2008's comic on:


Tags #stink eye, #banned telekinetic powers, #neutralize threat, #indian institute, #department

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Man says, "Beware the power of stink eye. Intern. I will make you bow to my will!" Asok The Intern says, "Gaaa!!!" Asok The Intern says, "Must...Use...Banned telekinetic powers to neutralize threat." Man says, "Grrrr!!!" Carol The Secretary says, "You have a call from the Indian Institute of technology. It's someone from the department of things you shouldn't do."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 18, 2008's comic on:


Tags #emotional investment, #company, #families, #divorced, #single, #never been kissed, #mission accomplished, #business

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The Boss: I want you to have the same emotional investment in this company as you have with your families. Wally: I'm divorced. Dilbert: I'm single. Asok: "I have never been kissed. Wally: Mission accomplished.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 11, 2008's comic on:


Tags #advice to intern, #don't finish on deadline, #freedom, #overworked, #less time, #nitpick

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wally: Heed my advice, young Asok. Only an idiot finishes a project before the deadline. The less time you give people to nitpick. The more time you have to pretend you are overworked." Freedom is just another word for people finding out you're useless.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 17, 2008's comic on:


Tags #soul crushing negativity, #humanity final chapter, #darkness, #anticipating

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Dilbert: That's my plan. Now I'd like to open the floor to your soul-crushing negativity. Jesus: You have written humanity's final chapter!" Tina: Darkness stalks us!" "I'll never know love!" Man: Anticipating it didn't help.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 11, 2008's comic on:


Tags #jesus, #leader, #team leader, #in need, #12 people, #upgrade systems, #lunch meeting, #bed feelings, #savior, #office

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It's pronounced Hay-soos. Jesus: My name is Jesus, and I seek twelve people to work on my project. I am the saver of databases. Join me to upgrade our systems. Jesus: First, we're all going to lunch. Asok: I have a bad feeling about this."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 29, 2008's comic on:


Tags #intern, #ideas, #reject, #listen, #putrid ideas, #warnings, #time management, #pretend to care

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Asok: I'll tell you my idea if you promise not to reject it before thinking about it. Dilbert: I already rejected it because only putrid ideas come with warnings. Dilbert: My time management is getting better. Dogbert:I can't pretend to care."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 19, 2008's comic on:


Tags #inmtern, #ceo, #powerpoint slides, #board of directors, #bonus, #luck, #tenuous connections, #hopeful

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The Boss: Our CEO didn't understand the powerpoint slides you made for him, so he asked the board of directors for a bonus. With any luck, the bonus will incent him to try harder to understand your slides. I'm getting better at finding tenuous connections to hope.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 17, 2008's comic on:


Tags #board of directors, #ceo, #hired mole, #intern request, #janitor, #mole, #pulling rank, #rat, #rodent, #senior vp

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Asok: Who will present my findings to the board of directors?" The Boss: They only listen to the CEO. And he only listens to the senior vice presidents, and they only listen to the... Asok: Could you show this to the janitor for me?" RatBert: Whoa! Whoa! You don't talk to me directly!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 16, 2008's comic on:


Tags #project, #stink of unimportnace, #interns, #board of directors, #insult

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Asok: I finished my project and I'm ready to present it to the board of directors. The Boss: Interns don't speak to the board of directors, Asok. It would be considered an insult. Asok: How is that an insult? The Boss: You have the stink of unimportance.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 12, 2008's comic on:


Tags #goal, #rewrite law, #supply & demand, #toss a purr

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Catbert: Evil director of human resources Asok: I need a goal. What can I do to get a raise? Catbert: Try rewriting the law of supply and demand. Asok: Harsh. Catbert: I have to toss a purr your way."