Customer Information Comic Strips - Page 9
338 Results for Customer Information
View 81 - 90 results for customer information comic strips. Discover the best "Customer Information" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share October 08, 2010's comic on:
The Boss says, "The customer is an attractive young woman. You'll need to bring a handsome man with you to translate." The Boss says, "The translator will repeat everything you say, word for word, but he'll say it more handsomely." Dilbert says, "Hi." Customer says, "What's he jabbering about?"
Share October 05, 2010's comic on:
Coworker says, "What do you get when you combine cognitive bias with inaccurate information?" Coworker says, "Our business strategy! Hahahahahaha!!!" Coworker says, "I guess I should keep my day job." Dilbert says, "Good luck with that."
Share September 06, 2010's comic on:
Dilbert says, "I got transferred to our crime scene cleanup subsidiary." Dilbert says, "I have a competitive advantage because I have the customer lists from our other subsidiaries." Man says, "No, we haven't had any deadly computer explosions here." Dilbert says, "I'll check back in an hour."
Share July 25, 2010's comic on:
The Boss says, "I?m glad your project was transferred to my department, Ronald." The Boss says, "Your project is flashy! It's sexy!" The Boss says, "But it's not worth funding because the revenue projections are puny." The Boss says, "Until something changes, you'll be in the limbo cube." The Boss says, "I'll trot you out whenever a customer or an executive visits." The Boss says, "You can show your sexy-flashy powerpoint slides while dreaming of being relevant." The Boss says, "If you work hard, someday you'll be totally forgotten." The Boss says, "Did you know that honesty makes people sad?"
Share July 17, 2010's comic on:
Wally says, "I'm on my way to a meeting with a prospective customer." Wally says, "We have such a long sales gestation period that the value of my efforts won't be known for two years." Wally says, "Just remember that optimism looks exactly like doing nothing."
Share May 26, 2010's comic on:
Alice says, "I learned to control men by exaggerating the importance of my projects and overextending myself." Alice says, "Our most important customer is coming and I won't be ready on time unless you fetch me some coffee!" Alice says, "In phase two, I make you enjoy it."
Share May 17, 2010's comic on:
Mordac the Preventer of Information Services Mordac says, "It's time for your operating system upgrade." Dilbert says, "Gaaa!" Dilbert says, "Please don't! My CMS software won't work with the new operating system. I'll be a technology have-not!" The Boss says, "It's never good when they wear costumes to complain." Dilbert says, "Ooga"
Share May 15, 2010's comic on:
Ratbert's customer support Ratbert says, "You're speaking to a powerless rodent." Ratbert says, "My job is to prevent you from getting to anyone who is authorized to give refunds." Ratbert says, "I'd like to begin by asking you some creepy personal questions."
Share May 08, 2010's comic on:
Mordac, the Preventer of Information Services Tina says, "My software is so old that I can't open any files that people send me." Mordac says, "I can't upgrade your computer because then it will be non-standard." Tina says, "And by non-standard, you mean useful?" Mordac says, "Be gone, wordsmith!"
Share April 28, 2010's comic on:
Dilbert says, "It takes you two months to process my company credit card expense reimbursement." Dilbert says, "So I get in trouble every month for incurring late fees." Dilbert says, "Why must I be punished for your incompetence?" Devil says, "Apparently I'm awesome."