Economic Success Comic Strips - Page 9
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204 Results for Economic Success
View 81 - 90 results for economic success comic strips. Discover the best "Economic Success" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday August 30,
2014
Tags executives, how-to, snobbishness, book on success, hard work, wise decisions, being lucky, lazy and dumb
Transcript
CEO: I need you to co-author a book on success with me. The goal is to make readers believe success comes from hard work and wise decisions. So instead of hating me for being lucky, they will hate themselves for being lazy and dumb. Dogbert: And for buying your book?
Friday August 29,
2014
Tags laziness, not caring what others think, total uslessness, key to success, discussion, employees, hoping it goes, business
Transcript
Wally: Asok, the key to success is not caring what others think of you. Coincidentally, that is also the key to being totally useless. The important thing is that other people can't tell which way you're hoping it goes.
Friday August 08,
2014
Tags executives, networking, key to success, avoid contact, with losers, send off, security
Transcript
Asok: I'm reading a book that says the key to success is networking with successful people. CEO: Did you get to the chapter where it says successful people should avoid all contact with losers? Asok: It seems we have a standoff. CEO: Security.
Saturday July 19,
2014
Tags thinking, secret to success, keeping things simple, absolute, realtive, alternatives
Transcript
Boss: The secret to success is keeping things simple. Dilbert: Do you mean simple in an absolute sense or relative to the alternatives? Boss: It depends on the situation. Dilbert: Sounds complicated.
Monday June 23,
2014
Tags career, success, who you know, know losers, promising career, holding me back
Transcript
Wally: Success depends on who you know. I only know losers such as you, so thanks for nothing. Dilbert; I'm sorry I ruined your promising career. Wally: You're holding me back.
Sunday June 01,
2014
Tags choosing, electronic mail, successful habits, eight things, inspirational links, emails, change subject, huge success
Transcript
Boss: Did you see my email about the eight things that successful people do? Dilbert: Yes. I did all eight things and now I'm a huge success. Boss: No you're not. Dilbert: I'm not? How's that possible? I did all of the things that successful people do. This only makes sense if the inspirational links you send me every day are a complete waste of time! So which one is it? Am I a huge success or do you email me worthless things? Boss: Maybe we should just change the subject. Dilbert: Is that what successful people do?
Sunday March 30,
2014
Tags gut in charge, gut instinct, ignoring certain people, key to success, morse code, never right, thinking, wants a sandwhich
Transcript
Boss: The key to success is ignoring the people who say it can't be done. Dilbert: What if they're all right? Boss: They aren't right! Dilbert: Really? Other people are never right? Boss: You have to trust your gut! Dilbert: My gut is telling me that everything your're saying is ridiculous. It also says it wants a sandwich right now. I'd stay, but I'm putting my gut in charge of my decisions. Wally: My gut sends me messages in Morse code. Here comes one now.
Saturday March 01,
2014
Tags ignorance (knowledge), obstinacy, studies show, offering customers, problem, prevent success, many otions, hinderance
Transcript
Dilbert: Studies show that offering customers too many options can prevent them from buying. Boss: Studies?? That doesn't sound like a real thing. Dilbert: I don't know what to do now. Boss: Maybe that's the problem.
Friday January 24,
2014
Tags executives, slapped ceo, report says, success is following your instinct, being passionate, engaged, creative, meaningful, office meeting, literal meeting
Transcript
Catbert: This report says you slapped our CEO senseless after he said they key to success is following your instinct. Alice: I was following my instinct. I was also being passionate, engaged, and creative. Catbert: Apparently the things you say actually mean stuff. CEO: How was I to know!
Thursday January 23,
2014
Tags key to success, follow instinct, slap you, stop babbling, relax, good feelings, slap
Transcript
CEO: The key to success is to follow your instinct. Alice: My instinct tells me to slap you until you stop babbling nonsense. CEO: Please don't do that. Alice: Relax. I have a good feeling about it.