Erase Hard Drive Comic Strips - Page 9
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416 Results for Erase Hard Drive
View 81 - 90 results for erase hard drive comic strips. Discover the best "Erase Hard Drive" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday September 26,
2015
Wally Thinks Twice As Hard
Tags #work ethic, #laziness, #motivation, #trick, #deception, #excuse, #lazy, #energy, #con, #health
Transcript
Wally: I'm working twice as hard as ever before. Most of it is happening inside my head. But trust me, my brain is working double-time. Boss: Um... that's great. Wally: Obviously, I need to work fewer hours because of the energy drain.
Tuesday August 25,
2015
Boss Falls Off Bridge
Tags #walking, #meeting, #meetings, #accident, #difficult, #gimmick, #manager, #idea, #ideas, #distraction, #Sports, #business
Transcript
Boss: My new thing is taking long walks instead of having meetings. Wow. It is hard to walk, read, think, talk, and drink coffee at the same time. Dilbert: He fell off a bridge. Carol: That's why I schedule walking meetings for him.
Friday August 07,
2015
Motivation Is Magical Thinking
Tags #motivation, #magic, #inspiration, #futility, #futile, #honesty, #hard truth
Transcript
Dogbert: Motivation is a form of magical thinking in which you imagine that your words can turn useless people into high achievers. Boss: But it totally works, right? Dogbert: Yes, because magic is real. Boss: Is it hard to learn? Dogbert: Not if you already know how to lie.
Monday July 27,
2015
Wally's Passion
Tags #passion, #drive, #ambition, #laziness, #catch-22
Transcript
Wally: I'm only passionate about doing things that are socially unacceptable. Should I follow my passion or should I continue being useless? It is totally up to you. Catbert: Try to find a middle ground. Wally: A mild interest in things that don't matter.
Thursday July 09,
2015
Hard Work Is Necessary For Success
Tags #work ethic, #laziness, #misunderstanding, #motivation, #hard work, #Advice, #brainwash
Transcript
Wally: Remember, Asok, success requires hard work and sacrifice. Asok: Got it! I will work hard and sacrifice! Wally: I was going to say that's why you should avoid success. Who brainwashed you?
Tuesday June 16,
2015
Click Rate On Death Alerts
Tags #advertising, #technology, #analytics, #smart watch, #app, #ad, #click, #clickbait, #attention, #distraction
Transcript
Boss: Our health app accurately predicts the user's time of death and sends a five-minute warning. Our business model is paid advertising that we disguise as "death alerts." CEO: How's the click-through rate? Boss: Surprisingly low. It's hard to get people's attention these days.
Saturday May 30,
2015
Who Can Insult The Boss
Tags #work ethic, #laziness, #payoff, #reward
Transcript
Wally: I heard we can insult our boss now? Dilbert: You can't. Alice and I can get away with it because we are hard to replace. Wally: Realistically, there had to be a downside to being useless.
Thursday May 07,
2015
Rewarding Wally's Failures
Tags #failure, #excuse, #laziness, #justification, #reasoning, #excuses
Transcript
Wally: You should be celebrating my failures instead of punishing me for them. Failure is the raw material of success. If I am not failing, it means I am not pushing myself hard enough. Boss: Fine. What have you failed at? Wally: I failed to work on my project this month.
Sunday April 12,
2015
Tags #leadership, #praise, #admiration, #anger, #compliments
Transcript
Alice: What do you want now? Dilbert: Experts say leaders should surround themselves with people they admire and be generous with praise. Alice, I admire your hard work and intellect. Alice: Stop it! This is creepy! Dilbert: I admire your focus and your determination. Alice: Gaaa!!! Stop admiring me! My skin is crawling! Dilbert: I admire your honesty! Alice: Blech! Wally: Do you feel more like a leader now? Dilbert: Yes, in the sense that people hate me.
Tuesday March 10,
2015
Ceo Agrees To Mentor Wally
Tags #laziness, #work ethic, #mentor, #mentors, #mentoring, #protege, #power
Transcript
Wally: Will you be my mentor? CEO: Yes I will! You are wise to ask because it shows you have the drive to succeed. Wally: Exactly! Boss: Give me one good reason I shouldn't fire you. Wally: My mentor is your boss.