Family Friendly Policy Comic Strips - Page 9

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

275 Results for Family Friendly Policy

View 81 - 90 results for family friendly policy comic strips. Discover the best "Family Friendly Policy" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 28, 2012's comic on:


Tags #raise, #married with children, #new family, #benefit expenses, #laser like focus, #procreating

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: Give me a raise or else I'll get married and have children. My new family would increase your benefit expenses and distract me from my laser-like focus on work. Boss: I will gladly pay extra to prevent you from procreating. Wally: Word it any way you like.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 22, 2011's comic on:


Tags #embarrassed of son, #Family, #food service industry, #insult, #locksmith, #mother, #named project manger, #paying for lunch, #restaurants, #sons occupation, #don't tell freinds

View Transcript

Transcript

Mom, the good news I wanted to tell you is that my boss named me project manager. Mom: Please keep that to yourself. I tell my friends you're a locksmith. Dilbert: You're paying for your own lunch. Waiter: I'm Ed. I'll be your project manager.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 30, 2011's comic on:


Tags #deception, #hypocrisy, #open door policy, #suggestions, #not importnat, #extra work

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Thanks for the suggestion, Asok. I'm going to ignore it because you're not important to my career and I don't like doing extra work. Asok: I'm confused. Why do you have an open-door policy? Boss: How can you leave if the door isn't open?

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 26, 2011's comic on:


Tags #business ethics, #health insurance, #reduce expenses, #radiation dosimeters, #wrongness, #policy

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: The company is trying to reduce expenses, so you need to pay for your own radiation dosimeters. Dilbert: We'll just stare at you until you understand the wrongness of that policy. Boss: Still nothing. One hour later

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 26, 2011's comic on:


Tags #commerce, #economic policy, #utax incentives, #projects, #tax savings, #executive bonuses, #stimulate economy, #trickle on your heads, #trickle down theory, #poker night

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "We've decided to use the new tax incentives on the projects we were going to do anyway." The Boss says, "The tax savings will go toward executive bonuses, which stimulate the economy via the 'trickle on your heads' theory." Alice says, "It's called the 'trickle down' theory." The Boss says, "Not on poker night."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 03, 2011's comic on:


Tags #environmental issues, #children, #interviews, #Family

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "Jim, our company is family-friendly and very green." The Boss says, "We're also good at setting priorities, so if I get a chance to sell your kids for a handful of carbon credits, I'll do it." The Boss says, "He was less green than I had hoped."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 27, 2010's comic on:


Tags #flying monkey, #supreme leadership, #heir, #father, #son, #crazy, #office, #Family

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO says, "Assemble the supreme leadership board. I am ready to name an heir to succeed me." Dilbert says, "We don't have a supreme leadership board, and this isn't a hereditary dictatorship." CEO says, "That's crazy talk." Monkey says, "Ignore him, daddy."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 13, 2010's comic on:


Tags #new employee, #coworker, #meeting, #introduce, #front, #marketing, #social media, #facebook, #twitter, #blog, #scared, #point, #accuse, #fire, #business, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "Beth is our new marketing manager for social media." The Boss says, "By the way, company policy forbids the use of Facebook and Twitter at work. And we don't trust you to work from home." The Boss says, "If you blog about how lame we are, you're fired!!!" Beth thinks, "First day, not so good."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 14, 2010's comic on:


Tags #mother, #son, #sarcastic, #plant, #flower pot, #web only company, #imagination, #Family

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "My company is going to a web-only business model." Mom says, "That's terrific." Mom says, "What's phase three? Does it involve operating only in your own imagination?" Dilbert says, "Be nice." Mom says, "Maybe you can help me grow this plant back into a seed."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 08, 2010's comic on:


Tags #favor, #ask, #phone ring, #children, #bogeyman, #mailman, #angry, #Family

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "Carol, would you?" Carol says, "Here's an interesting experiment?" Carol says, "Watch what happens to your blood pressure when I take this call and make you wait." Carol says, "Yeah? What's the problem now?" Carol says, "Tell your brother I said to stop biting the ehads off your dolls." Carol says, "Uh-huh... well, if the man was wearing a postal uniform, he wasn't the bogeyman." Carol says, "You did what to him?" Carol says, "Listen carefully. I want you to tear up the carpet in the fancy bathroom..." Dilbert says, "I can come back."