Improved Dating Life Comic Strips - Page 9
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546 Results for Improved Dating Life
View 81 - 90 results for improved dating life comic strips. Discover the best "Improved Dating Life" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday May 11,
2016
Company Policy About Dating
Tags #dating, #relationships, #office romance, #policy, #legal issues, #human resources, #business
Transcript
Catbert: Rumor has it that you are dating a co-worker named Loud Howard. Company policy requires you to register your lustful feelings with our legal department. Lawyer: Okay, I think we have you covered, but the stapling phase will sting a little.
Tuesday May 10,
2016
Tina's Office Romance Not A Secret
Tags #secret, #relationship, #dating, #clues, #sleuting, #loud, #shouting, #relationships
Transcript
Alice: How's your office romance with Loud Howard coming along? Tina: How did you hear about us? Alice: He's loud and you're always covered with his spittle. Tina: I was hoping it looked like perspiration.
Monday May 09,
2016
Loud Howard And Tina Have A Romance
Tags #romance, #relationships, #dating, #secret, #speaking, #loud, #shouting
Transcript
Loud Howard. Tina: We must keep our office romance a secret. Howard: I won't tell anyone about us, Tina!!!! Dilbert: You have a bad case of Loud Howard hair. But what does the extra spittle mean? Hmmm... Tina: Grrrr...
Thursday April 28,
2016
Longest Date Ever
Tags #dating, #relationships, #Women, #Men, #attraction, #record, #conversation
Transcript
Dilbert: My date lasted 53 minutes. Dogbert: That's your longest yet. Was she trapped in any way, such as under rubble? Dilbert: Nope! Dogbert: Wow. How'd you do it? Dilbert: I didn't talk for the first 49 minutes.
Wednesday April 27,
2016
Miracle Of Consciousness
Tags #jaded, #blase, #unimpressed, #dating, #relationships
Transcript
Woman: Do you ever marvel at the miracle of consciousness? Dilbert: No. People are just fish plus time. Woman: Does anything amaze you? Dilbert: This is my longest date ever! 49 minutes!
Sunday April 03,
2016
Tags #Advice, #advising, #teenagers, #parents, #Parenting, #tattoo, #piercing, #terrorism, #boundaries
Transcript
Carol: My teenager wants to pierce his ear. Should I let him? Dilbert: Sure. It's only a tiny hole and it heals. Carol: Good point. Narrator: Next day. Carol: Now he wants a small tattoo. Dilbert: Well, if it doesn't show... Narrator: Next week. Carol: Now he wants to grow a human ear on his back, the way scientists did with that rat. Dilbert: As long as he can cover it with a shirt when he gets a job, I see no problem. You have to let him live his own life. Narrator: One week later. Carol: He joined ISIS. Dilbert: I forgot to mention that I'm no good at giving advice.
Monday February 29,
2016
Asok Has Tasted The Sweet Freedom Of Uber
Tags #experience, #guest artist, #introspection, #john glynn, #wisdom
Transcript
Asok: Now that I have tasted the sweet freedom of being an Uber driver, how can I go back to this life? Wally: Try looking deep within yourself, Asok. Asok: You are even wiser than usual. Wally: You'll need a flashlight and yoga lessons.
Sunday February 28,
2016
Tags #dating, #fitbit, #hackers, #hacking, #information, #privacy, #spying, #surveillance, #technology, #relationships
Transcript
Hackers Convention. Dilbert: Hi, I'm Dilbert. Woman: I know. I just hacked your phone, your credit card, and your fitness band. No need for conversation. I know everything about you, including your current physiological state. Dilbert: I feel violated. Woman: No, you don't. Your vital signs are elevated. That means you're falling in love with me. Dilbert: Ha! I just hacked your fitness band and I see you have... no interest in me whatsoever. It was too late to reject her first.
Tuesday February 23,
2016
Asok Needs Money And Social Life
Tags #ride share, #rideshare, #uber, #driver, #taxi, #job, #business
Transcript
Asok: I have no social life and I need extra money. What should I do? Wally: You're one Prius away from being an Uber driver. Narrator: Continued.
Saturday February 13,
2016
Yoga For Posture
Tags #yoga, #posture, #dating, #attraction, #Women, #relationships
Transcript
Dilbert: I don't know what to do about my bad posture. Dogbert: Try yoga. Dilbert: Ooh, good idea. That will also improve my odds of meeting an attractive yoga-loving woman. Man: That was my plan too, but the full-stack guys gut here early and scared away the yoga women.