Pulled Over Comic Strips - Page 9

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

640 Results for Pulled Over

View 81 - 90 results for pulled over comic strips. Discover the best "Pulled Over" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 29, 2013's comic on:


Tags #happiness, #questioning, #employees are happiest, #jobs give meaning, #sense of meaning, #bag of organ meat, #draped over, #electric fence, #psychology

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I read an article that says employees are happiest when their jobs give them a sense of meaning. What is this "sense of meaning" thing and how can I get some of it? Because I feel like a bag of organ meat draped over an electric fence. Boss: Almost the same thing.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 11, 2013's comic on:


Tags #cruelty, #managers & supervisors, #employment studies, #good boss, #getting riase, #less dysfunctional, #creepy dude, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: Studies say employees prefer having a good boss over getting a raise. So instead of giving raises, pretend to be less dysfunctional. It's cheaper. Bwahahahaha!!! Boss: You're a creepy little dude.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 29, 2012's comic on:


Tags #executives, #managers & supervisors, #reorganizing, #overthinking, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: I'm reorganizing the company and giving every manager a new job. Boss: Why? CEO: You're over-thinking it.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 17, 2012's comic on:


Tags #interviews, #job hopper, #more passive, #stereo typing

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Your work history suggests that you might be a job-hopper. Interviewee: Oh, really? Well, I should hop all over you for saying that! Boss: I thought you would be more passive. Interviewee: Wow. You cannot stop stereotyping.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 16, 2012's comic on:


Tags #employees, #late, #chronically late, #pre meeting, #trick, #chronic lateness, #power, #selfish, #bad attitude, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Let's meet before the project meeting to go over a few things. Coworker: Nice try. We chronically late people know when we're being played. Your pre-meeting is a trick to get me to show up on time for the real meeting. But that won't work because poor planning isn't the cause of my chronic lateness. I make people wait for me because I enjoy the power and I don't care about anyone's feelings. Dilbert: Fine. I'll see you at the project meeting at ten. Coworker: Nice try. I know the meeting is at 10:30. Dilbert: How do you keep a job? Coworker: That attitude is exactly why I don't like people.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 05, 2012's comic on:


Tags #suspicion, #assemble data, #boring work, #quality over quality, #poor politics, #office politics

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I need you to assemble a huge amount of totally incomprehensible data. Make it boring so no one looks at it too closely. I'm aiming for quantity over quality. Dilbert: I have a bad feeling about this. Boss: No one would pay you to feel good.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 07, 2012's comic on:


Tags #ignorance (knowledge), #managers & supervisors, #employees, #hatered, #run over, #clown, #ugly truth, #demise, #bad wishes, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Ugly Truth Visits Man: Your employees hate your carb-fattened guts. They hope you get run over by a clown car because it will make your demise extra funny. Boss: I hear mumbling but no on is there! Man: It's weird for me too.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 19, 2012's comic on:


Tags #business ethics, #consumer protection, #court ordered, #good defense, #internal emails, #known to be dangerous

View Transcript

Transcript

Lawyer: The court ordered us to turn over all of our internal emails. Have you ever mentioned in email that our products are known to be dangerous but we don't care? CEO: I don't even know what products we make. Lawyer: That's a good defense. We might need that.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 14, 2012's comic on:


Tags #interviews, #resume, #piece of work, #lie, #exaggeration, #mispelling, #bad format, #failed prodcuts, #salsa dancer, #applicants resume, #handsome fellow, #busted

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Take a look at this resume. Alice: Ha ha! This guy is a piece of work! Lie... lie... exaggeration... misspelling... bad format... worked on failed products. Ooh! He's also a champion salsa dancer. What a tool! Wait. Why aren't you joining in the traditional mocking of the applicant's resume? Dilbert: I'm waiting to find out if he's the handsome fellow standing behind you. Alice: Scoot over. You're blocking my view of a handsome guy.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 03, 2012's comic on:


Tags #work ethic, #leave early, #five minutes, #good not great

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: You did good work this week. I give you permission to leave early today. Dilbert: It's five minutes before my normal quitting time. Boss: Your work was good, not great. Get over yourself.