To Do List Comic Strips - Page 9
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View 81 - 90 results for to do list comic strips. Discover the best "To Do List" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share August 06, 2002's comic on:
An employee asks Carol, "May I use your three-hole punch?" Carol waves her hand and exclaims, "Whoa Whoa Whoa!" Carol says, "You can't come waltzing into this department, using our stuff and leaving your holes." The employee says, "I'll clean up the holes." Carol hands him a piece of paper, "I want you to whack the people on this list."
Share July 28, 2002's comic on:
Dilbert is at the checkout line of a supermarket. The cashier asks him, "Are you a member of our frequent grocery club?" Dilbert responds, "No, what is it?" The cashier replies, "You get a membership card that entitles you to discounts." Dilbert says, "Let's see if I have this straight..." Dilbert continues, "I'll be inconvenienced by having to fill out a form and carry your stupid card around..." Dilbert continues, "And in return, you'll put me on a junk mail list, and charge me the same as the grocery store across the street?" Dilbert yells, "AND YOU EXPECT ME TO BE HAPPY ABOUT IT?!!" The customer in line behind Dilbert says, "But it's free!" The cashier says into the intercom, "Cleanup on register two.. it's engineer spittle."
Share July 23, 2002's comic on:
Alice says to Tina, "This is a list of our executives who sold stock before announcing bankruptcy." Alice continues, "My plan is to bring each executive to the roof, hold him by the ankles, and shake." Tina stands on the sidewalk with an open bag. Money and personals fall from the roof. Tina says, "Ooh! A cat comb!"
Share December 05, 2001's comic on:
Dogbert stands on The Boss' desk. Dogbert says, "I can teach you to manage your time more efficiently." Dogbert continues, "Put all of your high priorities on one list and your low priorities on another." Dogbert finishes, "Then do everything on both lists even if it kills you. Otherwise you're a freakin' loser."
Share November 11, 2001's comic on:
The Boss says to Ted, "Ted, I have to downsize you." Ted turns around and asks, "Was I doing a bad job?" The Boss replies, "No, it's more complicated than that." Ted asks, "Is my essential function being eliminated?" The Boss answers, "No, the problem is that someone in marketing spent too much for a trade show booth." The Boss continues, "So every manager had to submit a list of potential cost reductions." The Boss continues, "I might have accidentally sent the department phone list as an e-mail attachment." Ted mumbles, "*%! $@." The Boss thinks, "There are lots of whiners in "A" through "M."
Share October 27, 2001's comic on:
Dilbert and the troll are walking. Dilbert says to the troll, "So, if all trolls were once people, that means some people are already changing and don't know it." The troll replies, "Exactly." The troll opens a book and says, "This is the list of people we're waiting for." Dilbert sings to Wally, "I know something you don't know." Wally touches his head and says, "I think I'm getting pimples on my head."
Share August 22, 2001's comic on:
The dark haired woman from the gym and Dilbert are sitting on the couch. Dogbert is sitting on the arm rest next to them. The woman says, "I made a list of all the ways you need to improve in order to keep dating me." Dilbert reads the list aloud: "Lose forty pounds, new wardrobe, new haircut, new car, new odor..." The woman interupts, "But your dog is perfect. How'd that happen?" Dogbert replies, "When can you move in?"
Share August 05, 2001's comic on:
The Boss hands a piece of paper to Carol and says, "Carol, take this list of key employees to Catbert." Carol looks at the list and says, "I don't see my name on here. Should I write it in?" The Boss responds, "Um.. no. You're not a key employee." Carol stands up and screams, "What?! Are you insane?!! If I'M not key, who is?" She continues, "Do you think this list can walk to the H.R. department on its own?" The Boss responds, "Well, I could put it in an interoffice envelope and mail it." He continues, "Basically, you have the same job as an envelope." Carol hands Catbert the list. Catbert asks, "Why do I need to downsize these employees?" To which Carol answers, "Because they're funKEY, just like it says."
Share April 14, 2001's comic on:
Dilbert is talking to a worker. Holding a list, Dilbert says, "Your user requirements include four hundred features." Dilbert continues, "Do you realize that no human would be able to use a product with that level of complexity?" The worker says, "Good point. I'd better add 'easy to use' to the list."
Share April 05, 2001's comic on:
Looking at a piece of paper, Dilbert says to Dogbert, "Wow! I've been selected for the 'Who's Incredible' list!" Dilbert continues to Dogbert, "For seventy-five dollars I can buy a leather-bound book with my name in it!" Dilbert says, "Ha! And people said I was too gullible to be a success!" Dogbert reads the piece of paper, "Dear Occupant."