With People Comic Strips - Page 9
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1000 Results for With People
View 81 - 90 results for with people comic strips. Discover the best "With People" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday December 03,
2020
Wally Leaves Camera On
Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #technology, #video conference, #zoom, #inappropriate, #camera, #call
Transcript
boss with laptop on video conference. boss: um, wally. do you know your camera is on? boss is shaken and yelling: wally!!! no!!! gaaa!!! i can't unsee it! dilbert and wally in another room. dilbert: how was your zoom call? wally: i found a way to shorten it by an hour.
Monday November 30,
2020
Dilbert Has To Be Right
Tags #co-workers, #exercise, #arrogance, #Right, #therapy, #health
Transcript
dilbert and tine walking. tina: you argue with everything because you just have to be right. dilbert: how can you tell the difference between someone who "has to be right" versus someone who is right and you need therapy? tina: you're doing it again. dilbert: or am i?
Sunday November 29,
2020
Dogbert Does Telemedicine
Tags #business, #technology, #telemedicine, #time, #doctor, #health, #pain, #rake, #leaves, #medicine
Transcript
dogbert: i started doing telemedicine in my spare time. Dilbert: don't you need to be a doctor to do that? dogbert: technically, yes. but i found a workaround. dilbert: which is? dogbert: i tell people i'm a doctor. patient: doctor, i have a sharp pain in the back of my thigh. dogbert: are you sitting on a rake? patient: that's a weird question. oh. wait, i am. what should i do? dogbert: try picking up leaves with your hands.
Saturday November 28,
2020
Zoom Happy Hour
Tags #business, #technology, #zoom, #happy hour, #morale, #department, #alcohol, #drinking, #drunk
Transcript
boss on video conference with dilbert and alice. boss: we're going to start having zoom happy hour every weekday to boost morale. dilbert: you're the only one in the entire department who drinks alcohol. boss: you're all looshers. alice: did you already start drinking? boss: i love you!
Friday November 27,
2020
Boss Hires Stalker
Tags #business, #employees, #managers & supervisors, #technology, #working, #remote, #stalker, #window, #homes
Transcript
boss on video conference with dilbert and wally. boss: it's challenging to manage employees who are working remotely. dilbert sitting in arm chair listening boss: so i hired a stalker to look in the windows at your homes and tell me what he sees. he lasted on day. wally sitting in chair wearing shorts and no shirt: sorry. that's on me.
Wednesday November 25,
2020
Protestors Destroy Our Stores
Tags #protest movements, #protestors, #retail, #stores, #destroy, #hate, #cause, #donate, #context
Transcript
dilbert: all of our retail locations were destroyed by protesters last night. why do they hate us? dilbert: they don't hate us. we donate to their cause. dilbert: am i missing some context? boss: you should see what they do to the people they don't like.
Tuesday November 24,
2020
Working At Home Benefits
Tags #loneliness, #office, #technology, #video conference, #work at home, #co-workers, #mute
Transcript
dilbert at home on bed. wally's voice from laptop: how do you like working at home all the time now? dilbert: i was delighted to discover that a crushing sense of loneliness is better than spending time with my co-workers. wally: no offense taken. dilbert: and don't get me started about the splendor of the mute button.
Sunday November 22,
2020
Satellite Launch
Tags #satellite, #launch, #radar, #alien, #spaceship, #systems, #technology, #reality, #suggestion, #rocket, #trajectory, #bird, #belgium
Transcript
dilbert in control room with others: we've triple-checked all systems, and we are ready to launch the satellite. nothing can go wrong. initiating launch. boss: nothing can go wrong? what if an alien spaceship appears over the launch site? dilbert: gaaa!!! don't jinx us. boss: that's not how reality works. i can't make things happen just by suggesting them. dilbert: you're wrong! that is exactly how reality works! wa;;y: something just appeared on radar directly above the rockets trajectory. boss: maybe it's a bird. wally: it's the size of belgium.
Saturday November 21,
2020
Smells Like A Trap
Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #sarcasm, #disagreement, #change, #data, #reason, #trap, #insomnia
Transcript
dilbert: yesterday someone disagreed with me, and i changed his mind using data and reason. wally: that isn't possible. dilbert: i didn't think so either, but it happened. wally: smells like a trap. dilbert: i couldn't sleep all night.
Monday November 16,
2020
Real Men Multitask
Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #technology, #software, #software design, #concentrate, #multitask, #distraction, #kill, #error
Transcript
boss: do you ever think about the fact that one small error in your software design could kill hundreds of people? all it would take is some kind of distraction while you are trying to concentrate. dilbert: are you done? boss: a real man could multitask in this situation.