Annual Pay Comic Strips - Page 9

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353 Results for Annual Pay

View 81 - 90 results for annual pay comic strips. Discover the best "Annual Pay" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 27, 2005's comic on:


Tags #slight promotion, #pay same, #cucblice larger, #shaving the walls

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The Boss: "Asok, I decided to give you a slight promotion!" Asok: "Gasp! A slight promotion!" The Boss: "The pay will be the same but you can make your cubicle slighlty larger by shaving the ragged fabric on the inside walls." "Your new title is spelled just like the old one but it's pronounced totally differently." "ZZZZZ"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 05, 2005's comic on:


Tags #harpoon, #ass, #secretary, #donut eating, #remove, #annual review

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"It's a harpoon. I see a lot of this." "It's caused by a combination of doughnut-eating and agitating a secretary." "Can you remove it?" "Yes, but it will just come back at Annual Review time."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 10, 2005's comic on:


Tags #our annual report, #positive spin, #poor results, #stock plummenting, #can't afford us

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"Tina, I want you to write our annual report." "How should I explain our poor results?" "Just give it a positive spin." "If you have to ask why our stock keeps plummeting, you can't afford us."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 20, 2007's comic on:


Tags #senior engineer, #lead engineer, #pay is same, #disrespect you, #magic

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The Boss: I'm promoting you from senior engineer to lead engineer. "The pay is the same but people will disrespect you less." Dilbert: "Including you?" The Boss: "It's not magic."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 22, 2007's comic on:


Tags #favorable article, #publish press release, #write it, #work, #pay, #bride, #blackmail

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Tina: I hope you don't expect me to write a favorable article about your company just because you bought me drinks. Dogbert: No, I expect you to publish my press release and act like you wrote it. Tina: You can work or you can get drunk , but the pay is exactly the same.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 07, 2012's comic on:


Tags #recessions, #regular interns, #interns intern, #no pay, #semi relevant job experience, #slap you, #no reason, #stupid economy

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Boss: We don't have any openings for regular interns, but I can offer you a job as an intern to our intern. We won't pay you, of course, but you might acquire an imperceptible amount of semi-relevant job experience. And sometimes we'll slap you for no reason. Applicant: Stupid economy! I'll take it.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 15, 2012's comic on:


Tags #celebrities, #wealth, #money manager, #dumb celebrities, #pay close attention, #money invested, #protect money, #money

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Dogbert: I've decided to become a money manager for dumb celebrities. Celebrities don't pay close attention to where their money is invested, or who is stealing it. Dilbert: So you plan to help them protect their money? Dogbert: That would be one way to play it.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 26, 2012's comic on:


Tags #employees, #managers & supervisors, #money, #raise, #higher pay, #income higher, #boss salary, #intuition, #business

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Boss: I can't give you the raise you deserve because it would make your pay higher than mine. Alice: I don't see how that's a problem. Boss: Let me explain it to you this way, Alice. If you make more money than I do your compensation would be greater than mine. Alice: That's not a reason, you ignorant baboon! Boss: Okay, how about... I must be smarter than you because my income is higher. Alice: Gaaa!!! Boss: When I don't have reasons for things, is that called intuition or just common sense?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 28, 2012's comic on:


Tags #despair, #prices, #social media expert, #fee, #pay scale, #popcorn, #meeting, #hope left body, #business

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Dilbert: I assume we pay you based on how much you increase our social media hits. Consultant: No. My fee is whatever I think you're dumb enough to pay for ambiguous outcomes. Dilbert: Either hope just left my body or the popcorn is getting chatty. Social media expert

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 02, 2012's comic on:


Tags #engineers, #wages, #hiring engineers, #google, #million per year, #change the world, #average engineer pay, #money

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Interviewee: Google offered me a million dollars a year. What's your offer? Boss: Work for us and you can change the world! Interviewee: Change it how? Boss: By lowering the average pay of engineers. Hiring engineers