Being Team Leader Comic Strips - Page 9
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807 Results for Being Team Leader
View 81 - 90 results for being team leader comic strips. Discover the best "Being Team Leader" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday May 20,
1997
Tags #stupid, #ignorant, #being narrow minded
Transcript
Dogbert stands behind Dilbert's desk and says, "I was trying to decide if you're stupid or just very ignorant." Dogbert says, "Then I thought, 'Whoa, Dogbert, you're being narrow-minded about this.'" Dogbert says, "You could easily be both." Dilbert replies, "It only LOOKS easy."
Monday May 26,
1997
Tags #project, #boss, #information, #being followed, #cloud of doom
Transcript
Dilbert stands in front of the Boss's desk and says, "I'd feel a lot more comfortable if you'd tell me everything you know about it." The Boss replies, "I've already told you more than I know." Dilbert walks away thinking, "I feel like I'm being followed." A cloud labeled "doom" follows Dilbert.
Sunday April 26,
1992
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #sad, #story, #renowned, #monkey, #trainer, #beautiful, #discovered, #kidnapped, #wife, #leader, #sing, #song, #laughing, #thanks
Transcript
Dogbert sits at his desk under a sign that says, "I will listen to your sad story $5.00." A man enters and says, "I have a sad story." Dogbert says, "Sit down." The man continues, "I was a world renowned monkey trainer." The man continues, "I had it all: fame, money, beautiful family." The man continues, "Then I discovered that the monkeys were plotting against me." The man continues, "They embezzled all of my money and kidnapped my wife." The man covers his eyes and says, "Then my wife fell in love with their leader, Bing-Bong." Dogbert laughs. The man asks, "Were you laughing?" Dogbert hands money to the man and says, "Here's my five bucks. Thanks."
Friday September 19,
1997
Tags #downsized, #dinosaurs, #spike things, #safety hazrd, #ate ficus tree, #being professional
Transcript
Dogbert says to Dawn, Bob and Rex, "There's not enough room for all of you dinosaurs. One of you must be downsized." Bob says, "If it helps, these spikey things are a safety hazard. And little Rex ate your ficus tree." Dogbert says, "Thanks for being professional about this, Bob." Bob holds up Little Rex and says, "When you put him in good light, how cute is he really?"
Thursday October 23,
1997
Tags #autographs for sale, #check back, #martin luther, #martin luther king jr., #religious leader, #softball signed
Transcript
A man holds a baseball and says, "Wow... a softball signed by Martin Luther, leader of the Protestant Reformation." The man hands the ball to Dogbert. "I'm impressed, but what I'm looking for is something signed by Martin Luther King Jr." The man says, "Too bad you don't have anything from him." Dogbert scribbles on a baseball with a pen and says, "Check back in ten minutes."
Tuesday October 28,
1997
Tags #boss, #doesn't know, #being insulted, #with all due respect, #intangible benefits, #insulting, #monkey face
Transcript
Alice says to Wally and Dilbert, "I discoverd that our pointy-haired boss doesn't know he's being insulted if you say, 'With all due respect' first." Wally thinks, "I love the intangible benefits of this job." The Boss is leaving his office. Wally says to him, "With all due respect, is that your face or is a monkey climbing down your shirt headfirst?"
Friday January 09,
1998
Tags #mobster, #rival family, #hit team, #sympathy card, #surprise tomorrow, #write funny song, #burried
Transcript
Dilbert sits at the kitchen table with his laptop computer. He says, "Ted's brother was a mobster. Last week he was killed by a rival family's hit team." Dilbert continues, "We got Ted a sympathy card, then it snowballed into a surprise party for tomorrow. My job is to write a funny song." Dogbert starts singing, "For he's a buried good fellow... for he's a buried good fellow... which nobody can deny..." Dilbert says, "Good."
Wednesday January 28,
1998
Tags #deputy of common sense, #motivate emplyees, #insulting gifts, #symbolism, #chess pieces, #same team, #pawns, #saving rooks
Transcript
Dogbert is dressed as a policeman and stands on The Boss's desk and says, "You are accused of trying to motivate employees with insulting gifts." The Boss says, "You're missing the symbolism. I gave them chess pieces to show them we're all on the same team." Dogbert hass a hand on his gun and syas, "Specifically, you gave them pawns." The Boss says, "I'm saving the rooks for bonus day."
Friday April 10,
1998
Tags #no layoffs, #after merger, #Catbert, #evil director, #frozen asteroid, #protective space suits, #not a team player
Transcript
Caption: "Catbert: Evil H.R. Director" Catbert tells Ted and Dilbert, "There will be no layoffs after the merger." Catbert says, "However, many of you will be transferred to jobs on a frozen." Ted asks, "Will we have protective space suits?" Catbert says, "I label you 'not a team player'."
Sunday March 28,
1993
Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #touchy-feely, #department, #rumors, #flying, #lizards, #planet, #business, #zorbians, #team, #players
Transcript
Dilbert asks the Boss, "Do you have a minute?" The Boss sits at his desk and thinks, "Uh-oh, it's touchy-feely stuff." Dilbert asks, "What's going to happen to our department? The rumors are flying." The Boss asks, "What have you heard?" Dilbert replies, "Rumor has it that flying lizards from the planet Zorb will buy the company." Dilbert continues, "They plan to turn the employees into giant corn dogs on sticks." The Boss replies, "Don't worry about rumors. It's business as usual for now." Dilbert gulps and walks away. The Boss thinks, "I think I handled that pretty well." Dilbert and Wally have long sticks on their backs. Dilbert asks, "Are you sure this will impress the Zorbians?" Wally replies, "I hear they like team players."