Cut Corners Comic Strips - Page 9

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

131 Results for Cut Corners

View 81 - 90 results for cut corners comic strips. Discover the best "Cut Corners" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #happiness not realted, #level of wealth, #relative wealth, #good job

View Transcript

Transcript

"Research has shown that happiness is not related to one's absolute level of wealth." "What matters is one's relative wealth compared to other people." "So, if I do a good job, could you cut this guy's pay?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

"I want employees who are passionate!" "GIVE ME THIS JOB OR SO HELP ME GOD, I WILL CUT OFF MY EAR!" "And I'm a people person."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert's Communication Seminar "There's really no point in listening to other people." "They're either going to be agreeing with you or saying stupid stuff." "That should cut down on the questions."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

You've been acting strangely lately. Maybe you should cut down on the coffee. "You have failed me. Feel the power of the force!" erk! "Bad dream?" "I wouldn't call it bad!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #antique thing, #defective prodcuts, #free up funds, #larger volume, #longer test, #sales force, #quality control budget

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "I cut the quality control budget to free up funds to increase our sales force." Dilbert says, "So your strategy is to sell a larger volume of defective products?" The Boss says, "The quality will be fine. The tests will just take longer." Dilbert says, "So...It's an antique thing?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #entire budget, #empire building, #work on trendy things, #vote to cut budget

View Transcript

Transcript

Filling in for the Pointy-Haired Boss A man says, "Does your department need its entire budget this year?" Dilbert says, "no, we'll waste most of it on empire building and appearing to work on trendy things." The man says, "All in favor of cutting this guy's budget in half?" Dilbert says, "I call do-over! Do-over!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boss, #budget cut, #joke, #bleak, #budget cuts, #undead, #feast on flesh, #don't like light

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss: I realize things look bleak after the budget cuts. But remember it's always the darkest before the undead feast on your flesh. Because they don't like light. Dilbert: WE GET IT!!!

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #budget cut, #health, #bleak, #public, #poorly made prodcuts, #elevant, #organs, #still healthy, #black market

View Transcript

Transcript

After Budget cuts The boss: It might seem bleak now, but things will turn around... As soon as the public starts loving poorly made products that are relevant to a bygone era. In the meantime, who has organs that are still healthy enough to sell on the black market?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #driving, #traveling, #angry, #dangerous

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "Thanks for the ride. My company cut back on the travel budget." Driver says, "Do you mind if we stop at an abandoned slaughterhouse that's miles from civilization?" Dilbert says, "A little." Driver says, "Are you trying to make me angry?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #ridiculous, #explanation, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "Sorry I'm late. My company cut the travel budget so I had to hitch a ride with a serial killer." Dilbert says, "He took me to an abandoned slaughterhouse. I knocked him out with a hambone, stole his truck and drove directly here." Man says, "All I heard was 'Blah, blah, blah, I'm late.'" Dilbert says, "Don't make me get my hambone."