Eliminated Budget Comic Strips - Page 9
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315 Results for Eliminated Budget
View 81 - 90 results for eliminated budget comic strips. Discover the best "Eliminated Budget" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday July 19,
1998
Tags #goal to motivate, #build global satellite netwrok, #feel sdifferent, #Right, #energetic feeling, #pinned, #burning couch, #dizzy, #budget cuts
Transcript
The Boss and Dilbert sit at a table. The Boss hands Dilbert a piece of paper and says, "This is the goal that will motivate you for the next year." Dilbert reads from the piece of paper: "'Build a global satellite network. Budget: $12,000.'" Dilbert looks at the Boss and says, "Motivation feels much different from what I imagined." Dilbert continues, "I was expecting a light, energetic feeling." Dilbert continues speaking and illustrates with his hands, "But it's more like being pinned under a burning couch." Dilbert puts his hand to his head and says, "Whoo, I'm getting dizzy." Dilbert stands up slowly and says, "I'd better lie down until the motivation wears off." The Boss leaves the room with Dilbert lying on the table. The Boss says, "He's going to be trouble during the next round of budget cuts."
Tuesday August 15,
2000
Tags #disaster recovery plan, #help! help!, #hope to have budget
Transcript
Alice says, "Our disaster recovery plan goes something like this..." Alice points to a picture of a man screaming "Help! Help!" Alice continues, "Someday we hope to have a budget."
Wednesday September 27,
2000
Tags #forty million dollars, #needs approval, #over budget, #whose side?
Transcript
Dilbert holds out a slip of paper to his Boss and says, "This needs your approval." The Boss looks at the piece of paper and Dilbert continues, "The company will save forty million dollars but you'll be ten thousand over budget." Dilbert says, "And before you ask, no it won't work the other way around." The Boss says, "Whose side are you on?"
Thursday September 28,
2000
Tags #show plan, #budget, #resources, #weakness
Transcript
The Boss sits at his desk and Dilbert says, "I'm sure your boss will increase the budget if you show him my plan." The Boss throws up his arms and says, "I just asked him for something else. I can't keep asking him for resources!" Dilbert asks, "So...you think that doing your job is a sign of weakness?" The Boss points at Dilbert and says, "Look what it did to you."
Tuesday May 29,
2001
Tags #incredulous ed, #budget numbers, #request, #coworker, #budget manager, #hard time, #over reacts, #ed, #new hire
Transcript
Caption reads: "Incredulous Ed." Alice approaches Ed and asks, "Ed, do you have the latest budget numbers?" Ed looks up at Alice, squinting his eyes and gesturing, "Budget??? What is a 'budget' and why on earth would I have one?" Alice replies, "Because you're the budget manager." Ed hands her a piece of paper and says, "Here you go."
Monday October 22,
2001
Tags #explain charge, #budget season, #trolls
Transcript
The Boss hands Dilbert a piece of paper and says, "Ask the trolls in accounting to explain this charge." Dilbert responds, "Gaa!" Dilbert says, "Please don't make me talk to those trolls during budget season!" A headless man walks out of the accounting department. The troll standing in the doorway says, "Next."
Tuesday October 23,
2001
Tags #accounting trolls, #explination, #budget season, #spit on data, #95% spit, #finance trolls, #underground, #beneath the earth
Transcript
Headline: Accounting Trolls. Dilbert hands the trolls a piece of paper and says, "I need an explanation for these numbers." A troll responds, "This is budget season so I will spit on your data and send you away." Dilbert says, "That doesn't sound too bad." While one troll accumulates his spit, the other replies, "Our bodies are 95% made of spit."
Thursday December 20,
2001
Tags #another cubicle, #office moving budget, #transfer to elbonia, #relocation budget, #budget is shot, #mail yourself home
Transcript
The Boss says to Dilbert, "I want to move you to another cubicle but my office moving budget is shot." The Boss continues, "So I'm going to transfer you to Elbonia and then back so I can use the relocation budget." An Elbonian is on the phone. He relays a message to Dilbert: "He says the relocation budget is shot but you can mail yourself home."
Saturday February 16,
2002
Tags #trip cancelled, #travel budget, #contact centers, #training, #ignorance
Transcript
As Dilbert is walking out of the office, The Boss says to him, "Your trip is canceled." The Boss continues, "We used up the travel budget renaming our call centers to 'contact centers.'" Dilbert responds, "But I need this training." The Boss replies, "Isn't that another way of saying you're ignorant?"
Monday April 22,
2002
Tags #training budget slashed, #cancel class, #already paid, #appear smart, #while secretly stupid
Transcript
The Boss says to Dilbert, "The training budget got slashed. You have to cancel your class." Dilbert responds, "We already paid for the class." The Boss replies, "We'll look bad if you go." Dilbert says, "So, our plan is to appear smart while secretly being stupid?" The Boss replies, "You can make anything sound bad."