End State Vision Comic Strips - Page 9

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

261 Results for End State Vision

View 81 - 90 results for end state vision comic strips. Discover the best "End State Vision" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #anxiety, #work ethic, #worry, #indispensible, #fired, #useless, #riskier, #toe clip, #20 years of service

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: Wally, should I try to become indispensable so I won't be fired? Wally: No. Indispensable people end up working too hard because they can't risk showing anyone else how to do what they do. Asok: Being useless seems riskier. Wally: Have you seen the tie clip I got for 20 years of service?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #debates, #discussion, #ognorant, #arrogant, #reading comprehension, #logic

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: Your email was ignorant and arrogant. Dilbert: How do you know it isn't just a reading comprehension problem on your end? Let's use logic to see which one of us is right. Bad decision 2. Bad decision 3.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #debates, #discussion, #researching every state, #engineer, #solemn duty, #stamp out ignorance, #real thing, #googled it, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

Woman: Please stop researching every statement I make. Dilbert: I can't. As an engineer, it is my solemn duty to stamp out ignorance. Woman: That's not a real thing. Dilbert: See for yourself. I just Googled it.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #depression (mental state), #despair, #ugly partment, #two ugly roomates, #ugly bus, #ugly building, #ugly cubicle, #eat lunch

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: I live in an ugly apartment with two ugly roommates. Each workday I take an ugly bus to an ugly building and spend the entire day in my ugly cubicle. Dilbert: At least you get to eat lunch with us. Asok: I've said too much.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #frustration, #joking, #project staus update, #improve listening skills, #repeating

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Alice, I need your project status update by end of day. Alice: Ahleth, ah wan yer proja thatuth updah, fuh-fuh-fuh. I'm trying to improve my listening skills by repeating what people say.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #tv news, #financial report, #tv show, #cable news show, #Dogbert, #gold fillings, #remove your own

View Transcript

Transcript

News anchor: My next guest on money - n- stuff is Dogbert the doomsday pundit, DOgbert: Goldman Sachs is forming a Hobo army to take over the world. Start hoarding anything with a pointy end. DOW 975 DOgbert: Hobo army coming. News Anchor: after the break, learn how to remove your own gold fillings,

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #walking, #hallway, #dignity, #Sports

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert walks down the hall thinking, "Oh no . . . If this guy turns left when I go right, we'll end up walking down the hall right next to each other." The man turns and walks next to Dilbert. Dilbert thinks, "I hate this . . . A huge, empty hallway and here we are synchronized like two of the Rockettes." Back at home, Dilbert tells Dogbert, ". . . So that's when I knocked on the ladies' room door, yelled 'janitor' and ducked inside." Dogbert says, "At least you maintained your dignity."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #construction, #sign, #road, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

As he drives his car, Dilbert wonders, "Gee, how could anybody be opposed to building more roads?" Dilbert continues, "Every time I see highway construction . . ." Dilbert continues, ". . . Some protestor has already put up a sign." Dilbert drives past an "End Construction" sign.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #horses, #pun, #war

View Transcript

Transcript

The caption says, "Pun wars: how they start." Dilbert says to Dogbert, "I'm feeling a little hoarse." Dogbert asks, "Horse?" The caption says, "Escalation is inevitable." Dogbert says, "Maybe you got a colt." Dilbert replies, "I need some cough stirrup." Dogbert asks, "Are you gelding a fever?" Dilbert replies, "It's mare-ly a sore throat." Dogbert says, "Hope you filly better." Dilbert says, "Uh . . ." The caption says, "In the end, nobody wins." Dilbert says, "You're ugly!" Dogbert says, "I win."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #uncle phil, #hang glided, #tree, #hang gliding

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert shows Dogbert a photo album and says, "This is Uncle Phil before he died hang gliding." Dogbert asks, "Did he hit a tree?" Dilbert replies, "Let's just say he didn't read the hang glider manual very carefully." Uncle Phil stands on top of a hang glider with a noose around his neck. The other end of the rope is attached to a tree. He thinks, "I wonder if there's another reason it's called hang gliding. Nah . . ."